Birth story - Skye and baby Indiana

⚡️Triggers - contractions, infection

Pregnancy 

I fell pregnant in London during the first lockdown. At the same time our flat sold, anticipating a wave around my due date (Feb 1st 2021) my husband and I decided to pack up and head to Spain where my parents live to be close to them and give birth there. 

I was very lucky had a very straight forward and easy pregnancy, I had fatigue that immediately went away after the first trimester. I really loved being pregnant! 

I originally wanted a water birth but quickly learned that would not be possible where we were in Spain, as this is not something that is common here. I had to get private health insurance which meant my only option was an obgyn led hospital birth. 

Labour

On Friday 29th I started to feel pains in my lower back which were coming in waves every few hours. I always thought that labour pains felt like strong menstrual cramps so I didn’t think anything of this. They went away for the night, but the next day came back. I started to feel them more often and felt quite feverish. I spent the day bouncing on my ball, in complete denial that I was in the beginning stages of labour. That evening we put on a movie, but the back pain was getting more intense so I went to bed at 8pm. At 11:30pm I woke up in a pool of water, I thought I had wet the bed! I bolted up and told my husband I thought my waters had broken, got up and more gushed and told him they had definitely broken and we needed to get moving! The hospital was an hour drive away and this had made me anxious my entire pregnancy.

I was in a daze, while my husband packed the car with our bags and got our dog ready to drop at my parents place, I took a shower and actually made the bed, waters soaked sheets and all 😂! After we dropped our dog off and left my very excited parents, we got moving fast. My contractions started when we were about half an hour away from the hospital. I was so excited and nervous, we blasted music the whole way there to distract me. My husband kept telling me that with each contraction I was closer to meeting our boy which was my favourite affirmation and the one thing I had told him to remind me of during labour. Up breathing got me through the drive. We got to the hospital and I had to take a Covid test and wait for the results. Once they came back negative I was admitted and we were wheeled to our room, (my husband was allowed to be with me) I was checked by a midwife, and was only at about 2cm. I was then given IV fluids and told I was unable to eat or drink anything now, and also was not allowed any pain killers as this might stall my labour.... this was a shock as I had packed snacks to eat and expected some kind of pain killer to get my through. Unfortunately there is no gas and air available in Spain, and I was told nothing else was available. Looking back I don’t understand this but I don’t dwell on it! The midwife said she would come and check on me in a few hours and to “just deal with it” I told my husband to try to get some sleep while I laboured alone for the next 4 hours. No ball or anything else was offered to me, so I alternated from the bed to the toilet where I felt more comfortable. Although this was tough, I continued to use up breathing to pain manage and this honestly helped me so much to not only help pain management but get in the zone so I did not get overwhelmed.

One thing I still can’t get over is the transition phase, the way my body suddenly started pushing and I had no control!! I called the midwife in and told her that I was pushing. She checked and said I was about 8-9cm and ready to go to the delivery room. At this point I was begging for the epidural.

I was wheeled to the delivery room where my obgyn, and the anaesthesiologist were waiting. I was given the epidural (difficult and this was mid contraction and told to “stay completely still”) I immediately felt such a relief which after those few hours of labouring was amazing. I could still feel when I was having contractions, but they were not painful. My husband was then allowed in, dressed in his scrubs - a really surreal moment! He told me they had been playing the song Despacito while he was scrubbing in 😂

3 pushes later out came Indy at 6:30am, 7 hours after my waters broke. He was plopped onto my tummy (the cord was very short and wouldn’t reach my chest). I had asked for delayed cord clamping but this didn’t happen, maybe it’s not standard practice here. Either way in that moment I didn’t care. Indy was taken away to be weighed and cleaned while I was being stitched up (I had an episiotomy to avoid a tear). The placenta came out (no idea if this was with the injection or on its own as I was not asked or told) and we were wheeled upstairs to our room. My first meal was Paella which I thought was hilarious. We spent the next 48 hours in hospital in a surreal state of love and shock! We were discharged after 2 days with a clean bill of health. 

Once we got home things took a turn.

There was no after care with the private healthcare here, when I was discharged from hospital they said adiós and told me to schedule an appointment at the end of the 4th trimester. I believe if there was aftercare or a midwife visit perhaps things would have been very different. 4 days postpartum my milk had still not come in and I was in excruciating pain from my episiotomy. I couldn’t walk or sit, and was trying to breastfeed but this was not happening (milk came in on Thursday) I gave birth on Sunday and on the Thursday I also started convulsing from the pain in my episiotomy. We rushed to the emergency room, by then due to the pain I was in and the long drive, Indy hadn’t eaten in about 6 hours. I was so out of it I did not realise, and I will feel guilty for this forever. We got to the hospital where I was rushed to see the A&E gynaecologist, and found I had a terrible infection.

In the waiting room a paediatrician noticed my husband holding Indy and asked to see him. When we had originally left hospital Indy was jaundice but I was told that was normal and to get him in the sunlight a few minutes a day. However his jaundice worsened and he was very small and was admitted into hospital again. He had lost over 17% of his weight since his birth on Sunday (mainly due to my milk delay and the fact that he was so weak - I was not aware that he was not getting enough colostrum as I had him on the boob 24/7) We were both admitted back into hospital and after a night in the incubator and formula milk he was on the mend, but as I needed IV antibiotics we stayed in hospital for 4 days. We were finally sent home, where we got our 2nd chance. I now feel like the first 2 weeks of Indys life didn’t happen, or I was not present to experience it.

In hindsight I wish I would have realised as my episiotomy got worse and worse that things were not right and got help sooner. I just thought the pain was normal and unfortunately I was very wrong! I also wish that I had been better prepared on what to expect from breastfeeding, and when to realise that it was not enough. I should have had formula and given him that. FED IS BEST. Although I wish the after care would have been different, and that certain aspects of my birth easier with more support from the hospital, in the end I cannot change the past and can only learn from this and look towards the future. I do not feel negatively towards the whole experience. I am forever grateful of the series of events because my boy is now a healthy happy 12 week old and the light of my life!!!