Birth story - Polly and baby Remy

*Trigger Warning* - use of word contraction

Firstly thank you to the Positive Birth Company for allowing me to have such an empowering and positive birth, especially in these very uncertain and anxious times. I read the book, and some sections a couple of times and did the complete online course (my partner watched selected videos that I thought would help him understand his role). He was a big skeptical at the beginning but now I can’t stop hearing him on the phone to all his friends saying how amazing hypnobirthing is!

LEADING UP TO BIRTH

I had such a beautiful pregnancy, I enjoyed every minute and was so lucky to not have any hiccups along the way. I was so distraught that the last two weeks of my pregnancy were spent crying most days and feeling so anxious about what would happen at my birth, seeing constant rumours online of birth partners being banned etc. I did feel like it was ending negatively and not how I envisaged starting my maternity leave. It does get positive... one day I realised enough was enough and that being so anxious would not help me or my baby (easier said than done), but I do believe I needed that time being upset to process how different it was all going to be. So any mums out there who are due and feeling uncertain, your feelings are valid but if you can, feel empowered that your birth will be beautiful no matter what, switch off from the media and spend those last days with your bump knowing they will be with you so soon!

On my due date I spoke to a wonderful local doula (therichmonddoula) who had reached out to her Instagram community to say she is there for a chat if any mums to be were feeling scared about their birth. I have to say, without her advice and what I have learnt from this course, I wouldn’t have made the decision that day to switch to a home birth! The reason behind this was that the MLU I had planned to birth at was no longer an option and I desperately wanted to use a pool for labour or birth. I was transferred to the home birth team and instantly I felt calm, I think whatever decision I made would have had this effect and it was just the process of feeling empowered to make informed decisions for the benefit of my baby and taking back some control!! I completely understand that some regions are now stopping home births but I had also completely prepared myself to be on the labour ward too. Also if you are considering swapping to a home birth you will be informed of all the negatives which they need to do but remember we are all processing these ‘risks’ at such short notice rather than over the duration of your pregnancy and it doesn’t necessarily make them more riskier!

BIRTH STORY

I had been having some pre labour signs for over a week and was really ready to meet my baby, I was losing quite a lot of mucus plug and getting some period cramps in the middle of the night, his movements were also getting increasingly more painful down there so I knew he was ready to come out.

On Sunday 29th (his original due date before my 12 week scan) my partner and I were doing some ‘isolation chores’ and I was hoovering in the living room when I felt a gush of liquid and then instantly saw it dripping down my leg, I waddled to my partner and he was absolutely ecstatic! I knew this would put me on a timer for natural labour to start but tried to hide these worries. I went and put a pad on to monitor if it was my waters.... it definitely was and they wouldn’t stop coming! I called our midwife, who said she would pop by to check me over. Just as I hung up the phone my partner, who was cleaning our spice cupboard dropped a whole bottle of fish sauce all over our kitchen floor which made the next day smell interesting .

The midwife came over and explained as long as everything was fine with baby’s movements, colour of waters and my temp I would have 36hrs until needing an induction (I knew we would be seeing him sooner!). We spent the rest of the day chilling, eating and went out for our ‘ 1hrs exercise’ in the form of a short walk around the park opposite our house, which was quite strange with your waters leaking constantly. We went to bed at 11pm and I couldn’t really settle, my partner had a few hours sleep until I woke him up at 2am saying I think I just had my first contraction. He was being quite adamant that I should try sleep so I have enough energy for labour, but I simply could not lie on my side as the feeling was so intense!

I started timing them and using the up breathing with the positive affirmations playing in the background. Within an hour (3am) they were every 6 minutes! And by 4am they were every 4 minutes lasting a minute long. I called our midwife and she said to carry on until I feel like I couldn’t cope with the feeling and needed something more? I was quite confused by this but decided I didn’t need anything more and the TENS machine was really helping (I put this on at around 3am). My partner forced me to eat some cereal and drink some Lucozade which I didn’t enjoy but appreciate it in hindsight. Meanwhile my partner was busy setting up the living room with the pool and LED candles.

By 6am I begged my partner to call the midwife as I felt things had stepped up a notch and he said let’s give it until 7am. I upped the setting on the TENS machine and come 7am we called the midwife. She told me she would be there within the hour but then heard me having two contractions which were very close together and said she would be there sooner! I did try a bath but this was really not a good position as our bath felt so small and I couldn’t move freely.

By 7/8am I would say my contractions were at their peak and this was the only time I felt some ‘pain’ as the midwife arriving did knock me off my breathing a little. I got back on track and accepted an examination... I was 6/7cm! I continued to breath though my contractions and I heard the midwife telling my partner to starting filling the pool quicker which gave me some encouragement. He later told me that she had said this baby was coming and I could ‘turn the corner at any time’.

Whilst upstairs I felt my contractions change and my breathing turned into a mooing with some sort of down breath, I just went with it. I did need to use the loo a couple of times for a number 2!

Finally at about 9am I got into the birth pool and it was such a great relief, with my contractions I could feel my body bearing down and I just went with it, leaning over the pool squeezing my partners hand. He was great, and kept telling me each contraction was bringing me closer to meeting our baby and that I was doing such a good job. My midwife then suggested I try a squatting position and gave me some gas and air, which she then took away from me shortly after as it was stopping me going with the bearing down. I could feel baby’s head popping down and then going back up which was amazing and knew he was preparing my body down there!

After a while she could tell baby was getting a bit squeezed coming around the corner each time and my pushes weren’t getting him far enough. His head was right there! I didn’t want to risk anything and so took her suggestion to get out and birth him on the sofa. My partner was very quick to tell her I didn’t want to be on my back and she got me onto my left side with my leg in the air. With each contraction I could feel him making so much more progress and within 10 minutes his head crowned which stung quite badly! His head was born and we just waited there until the next contraction and his little body flew out, what an amazing feeling that was!! Remy was born in our living room at 10:59 30/03/20 . He started crying straight away and did a massive poo on me!

We had skin to skin and waited until the cord stopped pulsing before my partner cut it. I then gave him to daddy for their first skin to skin cuddles whilst I birthed the placenta naturally, with some gravity and a little push it came out in tact. We then resumed our skin to skin and the midwives latched him on for his first feed. I am so lucky to say I had no tears and glad I did regular perineal massage from 34 weeks. We both laid there on the sofa staring at our little boy, while the midwives pottered around cleaning their things up. After a while my partner then quickly cleaned up the pool, bathroom, bedroom and anything else I’d made a mess of! The midwife helped me into the shower and then bed and then my partner brought me a cup of tea, some toast and chocolate whilst I had cuddles with our little boy in bed just hours after giving birth! I am so proud of myself and I feel so grateful to have had an amazing home birth after changing my birth preferences just 6 days before!