Birth story - Michelle and baby Arlo

When we found out I was pregnant, I knew almost immediately that I wanted a home birth. After losing both parents, hospitals aren’t somewhere I feel calm or relaxed. I also knew I wanted to prepare my body and mind as much as possible. After being recommended the Positive Birthing Company, I began working through their digital pack and book too.

We used the relaxation scripts before bed a few times a week, and I listened to the affirmations every day. I used the relaxation mp3s while having long baths too.

As my due date approached, the news was dominated by Covid-19. I tried to limit myself to the stress it was causing, to keep oxytocin flowing, so had lots of lovely dog walks, long baths, gentle yoga, reading and napping in bed.

My due date came and went. I’d had a strong feeling my baby would come on my dad’s birthday, which was 6 days later. After having period type aches during the day at 40+5, I went to bed and then was woken with a contraction at 11.59pm. These started at around every 10 minutes, and got to every 5 minutes by 2am. My partner ran me a bath and we started getting excited. However, the bath brought my contractions to a complete standstill! So, we went to bed, and tried to rest, in the hope they’d come back.

I had on/off contractions throughout the day, all very manageable with up breathing. We went for a long walk, watched my favourite film, bounced on the Pilates ball and had a take out, and then went to bed early, just in case!

I was woken at 11pm with a contraction, which straight away felt stronger and more intense. I started using the Freya app to time them, and stayed in bed until around midnight, which is when I wanted to be upright. I found leaning over the bedroom drawers (U.F.O- upwards, forward, open), with dim lighting and lots of hip swaying, to help. I was using up breathing throughout. By 12.30am the app said I should call the midwife, so we did, she told me to run a bath and she arrived 30 minutes later. I never got that bath!

By the time she arrived things were ramping up. She observed me for a little while, and around an hour later I agreed to a VE, which I’d thought I wouldn’t want, but after using my B.R.A.I.N I figured I was starting to tire, and hoped this would give me good news that our baby was almost with us, it did the job! I was around 6cm, so she called the second midwife and told Toby to fill the birth pool and get the house warm, as we’d soon have a baby!

Even though we’d prepared playlists, an oil infuser, fairy lights, candles, affirmations, etc downstairs- I wanted to stay in our bedroom, it was dark, warm and cosy, a nice safe “cave”!

By around 2.30am, I went to all fours over my yoga bolster, and was feeling the contractions in my lower back. The second midwife applied counter pressure, which helped, alongside the breathing.

By 3am I started feeling pushy, so we moved downstairs and I got in the pool. It was heaven! It gave me so much relief to feel the warmth on my back. Toby put our playlist on & the fairy lights, and I was on my knees over the side of the pool, squeezing his hands, swaying my hips and listening to his encouragement to focus on the breath. I kept with up breathing between contractions to keep calm, and then used down breathing during each push. I remember thinking about Siobhan on the videos explaining the baby’s head massaging up and down, to take it slowly so as to minimise tears, so that’s what I did. Their head came out and a push or two later, by 4.01am on the 15th March, our baby was here! I was so in shock that I’d done it, the Midwife’s had to remind me to scoop them through my legs! I just clutched our baby to my chest and felt so much relief and so much love. We hadn’t found out the sex during pregnancy, and we realised we hadn’t checked yet, as I was holding them so tightly! So I held them out and Toby and I both saw we had a son! At which point I cried and we knew our boy would be little Arlo. I decided to pass the placenta naturally, and it followed around 15 minutes later, all while still in the pool holding my boy. Toby cut the cord (which we’d delayed), and then I was ready to get out of the pool to carry on skin to skin. We loved our golden hour of just cuddling and enjoying our first family time. Which was a part of my birth plan I knew I really wanted to protect.

I can honestly say, without the knowledge the digital pack and book equipped me with, I’m not sure I’d have felt confident enough to trust my body and to birth at home. Also, knowing that Toby understood the different stages and what to expect and his role in supporting me, was invaluable. Thank you so much! I cannot recommend enough!