Birth story - Lynn and baby Ayla

My first delivery was an induction in the US 3 1/2 years ago, and it was a wonderful experience. However I did feel like it would have been better without a couple things that annoyed me - being hooked up to fetal monitors all the time, and getting a little too high from the IV painkillers and epidural. So this time I hoped to go into labor naturally to avoid the extra monitoring (this time I didn’t have the complication that prompted the induction with my first!), and go without an epidural.

I had heard a lot about hypnobirthing, and decided to purchase the digital pack based on the recommendation of a friend who had used it. A lot of what was in there was information I already knew from other birth courses, and a lot was stuff that I had done anyway with my first, which I found really reassuring! It gave me the confidence to follow my instincts, rather than just going along with whatever someone else thought might work for me.

I started having frequent Braxton Hicks at 37 weeks, and every day thought today could be the day. Baby girl had dropped so low I felt like she was going to just fall out any time. I was starting to get really tired of all the pointless work (Braxton Hicks may not get anything done, but the muscle is still working!) when I went for my 39-week appointment. I asked for a sweep, and told my doctor I wanted to schedule an induction for the next week if I hadn’t gone into labor on my own. Later that night I realized that being tired of being pregnant wasn’t a great reason to sign up for a medical procedure that would probably eliminate my chances of having the birth experience I was hoping for, so I decided to try every old wives tale I could get my hands on to get labor going. I walked, bounced on the yoga ball, ate spicy food, had sex, used the breast pump, ate dates (I had been doing that already anyway) and eggplant, tried diy acupressure, and ate a bit of an Indian recipe a friend of mine swore would get labor started. The day before I was scheduled to go in for my induction at midnight, I gave it one last shot and did everything all at once, then went to bed disappointed because nothing had worked.

Then at 4 am I was woken up by my first real contractions! I knew immediately that these were not Braxton Hicks, and I was so excited it was hard to go back to sleep. Contractions came about every 15 minutes for most of the morning, and I told one of my coworkers (I’ve been working from home during the lockdown so I figured I might as well squeeze in one last day of pay!) I might have to disappear at some point during the day. My husband was very anxious and refused to go to work even though I told him I was still in early labor and there was no need to go to the hospital yet. Around noon he wanted to go drop our daughter off at his parents’ house, and hang out there until it was time to go to the hospital.

This was when I wished I had made him watch all the videos with me, instead of just a few. He couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to labor at his parents’ house until it was time for the hospital, he kept insisting it was the practical option. Between prepping my daughter to go to her grandparents, arguing with him, and then actually having to stay there for a while, I completely burst my oxytocin bubble and contractions stopped for a couple hours. I finally told him if we stayed there until it was time to go to the hospital, it would never be time to go to the hospital, and we went back home.

Once we got home, I went out for a walk and contractions started again. This was around 4:30. I FaceTimed my parents and chatted with them for a while until my dad said I better start thinking about heading out. He’s watched my mom go through this 5 times, so I figured he would know. I called the midwife at the hospital, and she said that typically they say to come in when your contractions are 5-1–1: 5 minutes apart, 1 minute long, for 1 hour, but the notes on my chart said I should come earlier because my first labor was fast.

At about 6:30, I had two contractions in a row that were 7 minutes apart and 45 seconds long, so I decided to head in. We loaded up in the car and got to the hospital at 7. I was still moving and talking during contractions, and they slowed down while driving and getting checked in. They brought me straight to a labor room instead of checking me in the assessment room first - perks of being a second timer, they believed me when I said this is it! We got to our room, and I used the bathroom, got into a gown, asked for the yoga ball to be draped with a sheet for me (I don’t like the feel of rubber against my legs!) and got hooked up to the fetal monitor for a preliminary check. As soon as all this was done, I felt a contraction coming in and stood up, as I was handling them best by standing and leaning forward against something. At 7:45, with this first contraction after getting set up in my room, my water broke!

I was still not feeling super active labor-y (chatting and laughing with my husband between contractions, mobile during contractions) yet. The midwife made a big fuss about how I needed to make sure to tell her if I felt the urge to push, and I was thinking “calm down lady, I just got here, I’m barely in labor yet.” The next contraction after my water broke came fairly quickly, the midwife hadn’t come back with housekeeping yet to clean up the puddle I was standing in. Probably a good thing, as more fluid came out, and I vomited. Even after all this, I was still feeling good! I waddled over to the shower complaining loudly about not getting to use the tub because of corona, and stayed in the shower for the next few contractions. Pointing the shower head directly at my lower belly felt amazing, as that’s where I was feeling most of the work happening and I was starting to feel sore in between contractions.

I stopped getting breaks between contractions and my husband helped me back to the bed where I knelt backwards, leaning on the raised back of the bed. My body was insisting that I maintain that upright and forward position, even as the midwife was trying to convince me to turn on my back for monitoring. Finally the contractions felt like they stopped completely, and I turned around to sit up in the bed. I kept saying “I’m so sleepy” and I realized I was in transition. I’m shocked I realized what was going on at that point, that’s definitely down to the digital pack!

I suddenly decided I absolutely had to FaceTime my mom immediately, and made my husband call her for me. As he was calling I was moving back into my kneeling against the back of the bed position, and as soon as I heard my mom say hi I started yelling “call the nurse!” Because I had had an epidural (a very very strong one) with my first delivery, I hadn’t ever felt the down stage, or the urge to push, and I wasn’t sure I would recognize it when it happened. I shouldn’t have worried. There is no mistaking the feeling of baby’s head being pushed against your pelvic floor! I finally understood why so many women describe it as feeling like you need to take the biggest poop ever, that is exactly what it felt like.

According to the call log, I reached the down stage at 8:18, less than 35 minutes after my water broke. My doctor hadn’t made it back to the hospital yet, so the on call OB came in, and I immediately started yelling at her. Every inhibition or filter I once had were completely gone, and every thought I had was expressed at full volume. Most of those thoughts were “NO!” The doctor wanted me to turn around so she could monitor the baby during contractions, and I refused. Finally my husband convinced me to turn because they had seen something concerning during earlier contractions, and I very grudgingly turned around so they could get to my belly. I went through one contraction sitting like that, (and yelling “NO!” at the midwife who was trying to coach me how to push) before I told them it was impossible and I couldn’t deliver my baby like that. I could feel her head hitting my tailbone, I was not about to push her out sitting on my butt.

As the final contraction came on, I yelled at everyone to stop touching me (I probably shouldn’t have, they were trying to stop me from tearing ) and got up on my feet on the lower part of the bed in a squat, leaning my hips against the raised upper part of the bed. The feeling of relief as I pushed her head out was overwhelming, and I pushed her all the way out in one contraction. (While making plenty of noise, despite the midwife’s advice to not yell ) I haven’t looked at the paperwork to see the official time of birth, but my husband sent the first picture of her to our parents at 8:42, so I went from barely starting active labor when my water broke to baby in my arms in less than an hour.

My doctor showed up a few minutes later, as I was cutting the cord. She stitched me up, and thanked me for not making her get out of bed at 2 am as she would have if I had turned up for my induction The midwife stayed and chatted with us as all the staff buzzed around us doing all the checks, cleanup, etc. She was shocked when I told her contractions had started at 4 am and we didn’t come in until they were close together. I think she may have forgotten during all the excitement that this wasn’t my first delivery, so I knew a little bit about what to expect. I kept Ayla on my chest for over an hour before I let her dad hold her, he had to ask if he could have a turn as it never occurred to me that anyone else should ever touch her. I was flying high on endorphins but still alert and aware of what was going on around me, which was exactly what I had hoped for.

I’m so glad I did the hypnobirthing course and really trusted myself to listen to my body. Ayla was bright blue, they told me if I hadn’t pushed her out then they would have had to pull her out. (Not sure why they were encouraging me to lay on my back instead of being upright if that was the case, I can’t imagine there’s any birth professional who truly believes that’s the most effective way to push out a baby!) She perked up immediately though, and didn’t have to be taken from me for extra checks because she started wriggling and crying just fine on her own. This is absolutely my last birth (I think delivery is a really wonderful experience, but I truly hated being pregnant) and I’m so happy I had the tools I needed to make it an amazing experience.