Birth story - Katie and baby Theo

*Trigger warning* - prolonged labour/labour not progressing, intense/painful and abnormal contractions, EMCS, cephalohematoma.

So it’s finally my turn to write my birth story! The number of hours I spent scrolling through the posts on PBC reading everyone’s stories, it hardly feels real that I’m sat here now with my 10 day old baby boy and whilst there will be those (like myself infact!) that would prefer to skip over my story as it’s so far from what most women would normally class as a positive birth (and the complete opposite of what I wanted and grew to expect given the stories on here), I feel I needed to share it as I now realise it didn’t have to be exactly what I wanted for me to be able to look back on it as a largely positive experience. And, my advice to anyone about to go through labour and birth would be to just be prepared to throw the birth plan out of the window (no matter how scary an idea that seems) because as I quickly found out, even the most average, low risk and healthy pregnancy can end up with unforeseen complications; but ultimately you will make the best of whatever situation is thrown at you and you will be able to take away positive experiences and memories from it regardless! And at the end of the day my gorgeous healthy little boy was delivered safely by an outstanding NHS team and what could be more positive than that!

The Pregnancy:

Whilst my pregnancy was very straightforward in terms of no complications and Theo being a very average and healthy little baby, I did suffer with relentless morning sickness and indigestion throughout the entire 9 months (as well as bad skin!) so I wasn’t one of these people that loved being pregnant! But I was very grateful for a healthy pregnancy! I did have a few episodes of reduced movements but I learnt that this was just part of Theo’s routine and he would have more chilled out days whenever he was going through growth spurts as I would also feel even more sick (and have more break outs) than usual.

As a result of the reduced movements, my hospitals standard practice is to induce at 39 weeks, but using my brain I didn’t feel there was any medical need for this so refused the induction and chose to wait for labour to happen naturally.

The birth:

My NHS due date came and went and whilst I knew he would probably arrive closer to his due date based on exactly when I ovulated, it was still a little disappointing as I was so ready to not be pregnant anymore by that point. I’d been getting regular Braxton hicks and period type cramps for the last week before the real contractions started but I never lost my mucus plug. Then on 10/09/22 I woke in the night to really intense period pains, backache and diarrhoea but didn’t think they were contractions as there was no gaps between them. After having a bath and some paracetamol they calmed down to a level I could tolerate so managed to get some sleep. However the day after I felt really sore from them - like my uterus had pulled a muscle - so I was relieved when they didn’t start back up again that night.

Fast forward to the night after (1am on my ovulation due date 12/09/22) and the real contractions started. These felt slightly different and they had 10 minute gaps so I knew they were the real thing, combined with some light spotting. They lasted all the way through the night, but then got gradually more spaced during the day at 20 mins apart. However whilst they got further apart they also ramped up in intensity. By 5pm that evening they were back to one in every 10 mins and I was having to breath through them and bounce on my ball with my tens machine on. And by 10pm they’d got down to one in every 5 minutes. At this point they were getting really unbearable so we called the hospital as they were lasting a minute each contraction but weren’t getting any closer together. Unfortunately they said we should stay at home until I was getting 4 in 10 minutes!!

As they were much too painful to sleep through, I ended up being awake the whole night and by 9am the next morning (13/09/22) I’d made the decision to go to the hospital for them to take a look and see how far along I was. Disappointingly the stress of it had made the contractions ease off somewhat and even more disappointingly they told me I was only 1-2cm dilated but fully effaced and baby was very low down. However she gave me a sweep and said it was likely she’d be seeing me again real soon.

The sweep really seemed to ramp things up again and the contractions were coming in hard by around 3pm that afternoon at one in every 6 minutes but lasting 90 seconds each. They then got even stronger until at around 7pm I could no longer take the pain as they were lasting nearly 2 minutes each and I was having one every 4 minutes. I also felt something wasn’t quite right as there wasn’t really a proper lull in between contractions so off to the hospital we went.

After being examined on the monitors they midwives were surprised at how intense my contractions were and how long they were lasting and were even more surprised to see I was still only 3cm dilated. Despite my birth plan saying I wanted a water birth with ideally no pain relief other than gas and air, I was quickly begging for a pethidine shot - the gas and air did absolutely nothing to take the edge off the contractions and only left me with a dry mouth.

After just two hours at around 11pm the pethidine had wore off and I knew without a doubt that I needed an epidural despite it going against everything I had planned and despite me having a bad fear of needles. The midwives first advised that I should have my waters broken to speed things along as I was still at 3cm, which I accepted.

After having 48 hours of contractions and not being able to sleep, having the epidural worked wonders for my stress levels. I put on my spa music while in the birthing room, with ultra dimmed lighting and my aromatherapy spray and the next few hours went by like a dream - all the while I felt only the familiar tightenings like Braxton hicks rather than the intense contractions I had been experiencing. After letting me rest and relax for around 5 hours the midwives wanted to check my progress and (surprise surprise) I was still only 3cm! Using my brain I accepted their offer of a syntocinon drip as I knew it shouldn’t be taking this long to progress. However again after another 6 hours on the drip, my cervix was still no further dilated.

It was at this point that the midwives were starting to get a little edgy and there were more people coming into my room as they’d noticed my temperature started quickly increasing, and that there were signs of the little man starting to get distressed on the monitor. They quickly administered an antibiotic drip in case an infection was causing temperature rise and started discussing the need for the dreaded C section - the thing I’d wanted to avoid most of all! This was around 11am on the 12/09/22.

Essentially, they explained my two options were to wait a few more hours to see if there was any change to my cervix. However I’d been unchanged at 3cm for 15 hours despite breaking my waters and having the drip, and with my little boy getting more distressed and my temperature still high I knew that more waiting when I still wasn’t guaranteed to progress further was a risk. Particularly as I wouldn’t get the vaginal birth I wanted since I was laid back on a bed so knew I was at a higher risk of needing interventions such as forceps, even if I did manage to progress.

Or the alternative was the C section…

They explained the risks involved with each option and gave me and my husband some time alone to discuss and go through it and make our decision. And based on how abnormal my 60 hr labour had been so far, with no guarantee that it would right itself, we decided a C section was the safest and sensible thing for both me and the little man.

Once the decision was made, the team of doctors and midwives were extremely keen to perform the section as quickly as possible and just an hour after giving them the go ahead, my little boy was delivered safe and sound.

The actual C section itself was also not as scary as I’d imagined. You don’t feel any pain just the pressure and tugging (a strange but not unpleasant sensation) and with my husband there and the amazing NHS team who were brilliant at keeping me relaxed and playing me some ‘Hot hits’ music I have to say it was actually an enjoyable experience! Combined with the sheer elation at seeing my baby lifted above the curtain and presented to me in a Lion King style moment, it’s something I will never forget!

It was noted that because of the prolonged labour and intense contractions my little boy had acquired a cephalohematoma on his head, a blood filled swelling that only occurs with very hard labours or those involving the use of forceps. Luckily they’ve said this will disappear over a few weeks to a few months but it reassured me that I’d made the right decision to get him out when I did as clearly my labour wasn’t going normally or according to plan despite Theo being a textbook baby and being in the perfect position for delivery.

Ultimately whilst it wasn’t the relaxing water birth I wanted, I don’t feel even remotely disappointed by how things panned out - and given just how hard and stressful my labour actually was I wouldn’t hesitate to accept an elective Caesarean for any future pregnancies! From the ultra relaxing night in my birthing room with my husband and wonderful midwife listening to spa music whilst enjoying the effects of the epidural; to the Lion King moment of seeing my precious bundle for the first time; to being wheeled out of the C section operation room with my little boy held tightly in my arms; to the outstanding care, support and warmth provided by the NHS midwives and doctors…there were so many positive experiences. So my advice to anyone would be, don’t be afraid of throwing the birth plan out the window and don’t be afraid of not having the birth you’d dreamed of because there are positives to be found from any birth and the second you lay eyes on your little human, you’ll know that everything was absolutely worth it.