Birth story - Jen and baby Daisy

Buckle up for a long and bumpy ride! Stick with me... this is positive I promise!

*** I was terrified to find out I was GBS positive at 36 weeks - this did not affect my labour experience at all and I didn’t even notice they were giving me antibiotics. I could have had a water birth with GBS if I didn’t have any other issues - baby is fine and it really is nothing to worry about ***

I never thought I’d get the chance to write my own positive birth story! I suffer badly with anxiety and pregnancy was hard at times for me - constantly worrying about every little thing. I was having major panics thinking about giving birth and the labour experience when a friend recommended I do a hypnobirthing course as it helped her. Due to my anxiety I didn’t want to go along to a class and so came across The Positive Birth Company online course and started watching the videos at around 32 weeks. It was an absolute god send and I loved learning about the science behind what my body was going to do and how to help labour progress naturally. I listened to the positive affirmations every day whilst in the bath with essential oils (my happy place) and found it so calming and relaxing and I just knew the water was going to be amazing for me during labour. I began to get excited about a calm water birth and happily wrote my birth preferences with my partner - we were starting to get excited! This was something I never thought I’d feel about labour and I owe it all to this course.

Fast forward to 35 weeks and I got concerned about reduced movements - went into the ABC unit (baby was fine just asleep and woke up as soon as the monitors went on- typical!) and was told as this was my 3rd episode of RM that I would be transferred to consultant led care. I saw him at 36 weeks and he told me I would need to be induced at 38 weeks. This is where this course came into play big style - I would never have thought to go against a doctor or suggest they weren’t making the right choice for me and my baby. This course gave me the confidence to challenge that. I used my BRAIN and asked if I could be left longer as I didn’t want baby to come un-necessarily early. He agreed to see me at 38 weeks and go from there. At my next appointment he was so adamant to induce me at 40 weeks and again (because I knew my baby was growing well and movements were fine) I asked for extra monitoring instead. He agreed but refused to let me go past 41 weeks. It was a compromise I was willing to agree to and was just happy little lady had longer to make her own appearance. I agreed to be booked in for a stretch and sweep at 39 weeks as I felt this was the best chance at me going into labour naturally - I really didn’t want to be induced! I was reassured I could still have my water birth on the labour ward.

39+1 weeks (Friday) - stretch and sweep ... midwife couldn’t get to my cervix as it was too far back, long and closed although it was soft. She said it may be a while before my body was ready. She did also note my blood pressure was high and booked me an appointment at a walk in centre for the Sunday to have it checked again. I decided to try to help baby along and walked for hours every day, ate pineapple, spicy food, bounced on my birth ball, did the deed, clary sage oil baths, acupuncture, reflexology (every myth going!) Sunday arrived and I went in for my blood pressure check. She offered another sweep - I accepted. 1cm dilated, soft cervix yet still long and blood pressure slightly high but not worryingly so.

39+5 weeks (Tuesday) and I went for reflexology. By the time I was home at 12pm I noticed I had had a bloody show and was happy although didn’t get my hopes up. Went to the golf driving range with my partner and out for lunch and then a long walk. By 5.30pm I was having slightly uncomfortable cramps and slight back ache but it was erratic and no pattern to it. I rang the labour ward to find out when they would like to see me (due to Group B Strep) and they said when I was having 3 contractions in 10 mins was fine and as a FTM that would still be plenty of time to have the IV antibiotics BUT that this was probably latent (early) labour that could last days/ weeks. I didn’t feel discouraged as I knew this was a positive sign. I had a warm bath and went to bed and the cramping stopped.

39+6 weeks (Weds) - No surges, went for a long walk and partner cooked spicy beef! By 6pm the cramping had come back! We set the lounge up with candles, diffuser, birthing ball and I bounced away whilst we watched the hunger games!!! By 8.30pm I decided to have a warm bath again. By the time I got in I was getting a little uncomfortable. I started to time the cramps with the Freya App (god send!) and realised they were 3 in 10 but lasting between 40 seconds and 1 minute. I was also bleeding a bit so decided to ring the ward who said they would like to check the bleeding and when they knew I was ok I could go home to continue labouring. On the way in the car, the cramps ramped up a gear and I put an eye mask on and listened to the readings on the Freya app. I got there at 10.30pm, having to pause as my breath was being taken away by each surge and was taken to a room to be assessed. They read my birth preferences straight away and I saw a midwife who had looked after me previously and I was really happy. She checked the bleeding and said that it was normal but that my surges had become way more regular quickly. She also wanted to take my blood pressure which was high and I had protein in my urine. They thought I had pre eclampsia so explained I wouldn’t be allowed to go home and needed to stay with them for both mine and babies safety. I was more than happy and asked for the birth pool to be filled and asked my partner to go and get the diffuser, candles etc to prepare the room.

This is when everything changed. They told me due to the suspected pre eclampsia and reduced movements that they were not happy for me to have a water birth and that they wanted continuous monitoring of the baby throughout my labour which meant a midwife present at all times. I wouldn’t be able to use the bath either. The old me (pre hypnobirthing) would have totally freaked out here... but I didn’t. I made the best of it. We set the room up and I asked for a birthing ball and told them I wanted to stay up right and the midwife said “I know your birth preferences said you didn’t want people talking to you but how would you like me to behave whilst in the room for the whole labour?” I appreciated this and asked her for encouragement and to make me laugh if possible! She was amazing. Partner set the room up and we got to work! Cannula was put in and had my first lot of antibiotics for the GBS. Surges ramped up, baby was fine and then I needed to use gas and air. My surges were coming quick and fast - very fast for a first time labour apparently. I used my up breathing and everyone was saying I was coping so well with how quickly things were moving. A doctor popped in to check all was ok and assumed I’d been induced due to the intensity of them. I didn’t even notice them giving me my other antibiotics. By 2am I was struggling and asked for pain relief and it was suggest I have a diamorphine injection although they’d have to check how far along I was - I agreed and found I was 5cm dilated. The injection helped massively as it allowed me time between surges to get my breathing back under control.

I continued to labour with my amazing partner cooling me down with a cool flannel, holding my hand and giving me a drink between every surge. At about 4.45am I decided I couldn’t do it any more - I decided that I needed an epidural!! Looking back now- I was transitioning! I asked to be checked at around 5.15am whilst still thinking I needed the epidural and she realised I was 10cm and she could see the babies head - I’d been feeling a weird sensation for about half an hour but being a FTM didn’t know this was the pushing stage - I hadn’t had the urge to push!!!! I had coached pushing from the amazing midwife and within 15 mins my gorgeous, healthy and happy baby was born. She was so chilled that she didn’t cry. Born on her due date - no induction in sight - my little prompt princess!

As per my birth preferences, I had delayed cord clamping, immediate skin to skin for 2 hours and my partner cut the cord. I did have a 2nd-3rd degree tear and was stitched but I didn’t even pay any attention as I had my baby in my arms!!!! All along I said ... “This was not the birth I had planned but this was the most amazing experience and I wouldn’t have it any other way - it was perfect for us.” That was all down to my mindset and all thanks to this course. I truly believe I couldn’t have had a better experience even though there were lots of things going on that I’d never envisaged! The midwives were truly amazing as was my incredible partner and made me so calm and I felt so safe throughout. I couldn’t have done it without him.

We are a very calm, chilled and happy family and I’m still using the breathing techniques if I feel anxious day to day. Trying to have baths with spa music as much as possible too. The techniques are second to none.

I can’t thank you enough!!! You really do work miracles for women and I can’t wait to go through it all again in the future if I’m lucky enough to have another baby. I could have given birth again happily the next day. I have sung your praises to many pregnant friends. Thank you again x