Birth story - Charlie and baby Olive

*Trigger Warning* - Use of contraction as it is not negative to me, deceleration in baby heart rate, episiotomy, second degree tear.

I feel extremely grateful for the labour and birth I experienced and I really enjoy sharing my story I loved reading every birth story leading up to my due date and hope that mine will now help others.

PREGNANCY

I was lucky to have a fairly straight forward, low risk pregnancy. In the first trimester I did suffer from extreme nausea and fatigue, but this tapered off by about week 16. The rest of pregnancy flew by and by the third trimester I was really enjoying being pregnant. Throughout the pregnancy I was consistently told that I did not look as pregnant as I was and at every antenatal appointment my bump was measuring a couple of weeks behind. Due to this, we had regular growth scans. These scans always showed that baby was measuring within the normal range and so we were not concerned. I knew my baby would be the perfect size for me.

LABOUR PREPARATION

I had heard lots of "trauma" stories of peoples births, but my mum had only positive things to say about all four of her births (all of which were big babies!). I was determined to have a positive experience. When faced with a challenging situation, I cope best if I feel in control and can actively do something to influence the situation. Hypnobirthing allowed me to do this. I came across hypnobirthing quite early on in pregnancy and booked the PBC course. My partner and I watched one clip together as and when we could. It took us a while to get through the course, but this allowed us to have regular talks around each topic. I knew that I wanted both my partner and my mother at the birth. My Mum was very enthusiastic to help - she took on a doula type role; completing the course, organising various props and regularly having conversations with me about the labour and birth. I also read a hypnobirthing book, practiced meditation, attended pregnancy yoga, and kept active. With my partner and mum on board, I had a great team and I felt as prepared as I possibly could for labour and birth.

LABOUR AND BIRTH

In the third trimester I had been getting loads of Braxton Hicks and from 38 weeks these became very regular and intense. I also got occasional period type pains of an evening, which I think were just positional. On a Thursday, at 40 weeks I was offered a sweep. At this point I had not had any signs of labour starting. My partner and I had already discussed sweeps and we used B.R.A.I.N to decide against having a sweep at this time. We did not want false signs and were confident that our baby would come when she was ready. That said, our most recent growth scan had shown that the baby's growth had begun to slow down. Our next scan was booked for 40+5 and there had already been hints of induction should this scan also show reduced growth. On the Friday I had a little chat with my bump and told her that we were ready when she was, and that she should come before the next scan if she could.

Our weekend plans were based around inducing oxytocin. Good food, walks, laughter, massage etc. However, on the Saturday morning, (40+2) I began to feel period like sensations which came and went. I began timing them but they appeared irregular initially. We headed out to the supermarket to get a few bits for a nice brunch, and I continued to feel and time the sensations. I was initially unsure if they were contractions but when we got back and whilst my partner was making brunch, they became more regular and I needed to use my breathing. I decided to let my mum know (she was about 60 miles away). I told her not to rush as it will probably be a day or so for things to kick off (oh how I was so wrong!). After brunch (midday), things really ramped up. Thankfully my mum had decided to set off and so was on her way. I put my earphones in to listen to positive affirmations and got into the zone. By 1.20pm my Freya app was telling me I was in established labour. However, I was not convinced due to the short time it had been and I felt okay to carry on. About an hour later I had my bloody show and mucous plug, so we called triage. We were advised to carry on labouring at home if I was managing as it was early on. I was happy with that as wanted to avoid going to hospital too early. However, at 3.20pm my Mum arrived and at this point contractions were coming every 2-3 minutes, so she convinced us to head to hospital. Eventually (in-between contractions) I made it to the car. The car journey was challenging - I could not sit down or put a belt on. I squatted, had my earphones in and eyes closed the entire time, listening to positive affirmations and practicing my breathing. Thankfully it was only a ten minute journey, but I could tell things were ramping up. I very much felt in the zone.

We arrived at the hospital at 4.25pm and I had a number of contractions before getting into triage and being examined. Some were every two minutes, but I was using my breathing and staying in the zone and staying in "green". I was examined at about 4.35pm and was surprised and delighted to hear that I was 8cm dilated!! Unfortunately, the MLU was closed, but there was a room with a pool available in the delivery suite. The room was beautiful with mood lighting above the pool. Midwives wanted to monitor baby, so they used the mobile monitoring so that I was able to be in the pool. With the mobile monitors on, I got straight into the pool and had some gas and air. This helped massively and really helped me relax in-between contractions. My partner was feeding me hairbo sweets and encouraging me to drink.

At some point my waters broke and my body began to involuntarily push. I was still not convinced I was ready to deliver. I remember telling the midwife that I didn't want to "push" yet because I didn't want the "pushing clock" to start. In hindsight, I think this negativity and doubt was probably the transition! I continued with my upbreathing, but my baby's heart rate had began to decelerate with each contraction. The monitors also kept slipping off my bump. So, after only half an hour of being in the lovely pool, I was instructed to get so that baby could be properly monitored and I could be examined. I was aware that doctors were lingering outside at this point.

On examination the midwife informed me I was ready to push and that we needed to get the baby out soon (I was not going to get the 2 hour of pushing allowance after all!). The two midwives were confident that together we could do it without doctors intervening. They kept me calm and focused and were like my cheerleaders! I was not allowed back in the pool, so I tried delivering my baby in a squat position on the bed. Unfortunately, progress was not quick enough so I ended up my back with legs in stirrups, and accepted an episiotomy. I really did not want to deliver in this position but getting my baby out quick was an absolute priority. I wasn't very good at the "down breathing" and in hindsight I had not practiced this very much. Despite this, I was able to keep calm and focused and my baby was born within 28 minutes of "active pushing", two hours after arriving at the hospital;, at 6.28pm. It transpired that the cord was around my baby's neck as she came, but she was breathing absolutely fine and went straight on my chest. Amazing.

As well as the episiotomy wound that required suturing, I had also torn. The midwife was unsure if it was a 2nd or 3rd degree tear. The doctor also examined me and thought it may be a 2nd, but suggested that it be sutured in theatre under spinal block (I was quite wriggly during the examination as I found it very unconformable). Now that my baby was out I think I had lost some of my ability to endure discomfort. I was initially disheartened that I was having to consider a spinal as it meant having to stay in overnight. I used BRAIN and decided to have the spinal. It meant the wounds could be properly assessed and sutured and I could relax and enjoy my baby. All went well and I was discharged the following day.

POSTPARTUM

The challenges that came from postpartum recovery and the transition into motherhood, for me have been more difficult than the labour and birth. I think emotionally, I had a bit of a "come down" from such an amazing birth experience. That, combined with sleep deprivation, hormones and breastfeeding challenges, meant I often struggled with a negative mindset in the early weeks. In hindsight, as well as preparing for birth, I should have also focused energy and time into the fourth trimester (postpartum). Perhaps doing the PBC postpartum course would have helped. It has been a whirlwind but I am totally in love with our little girl and adjusting to our new life. I would totally do pregnancy and labour again. As for the newborn stage?…...ask me in a few months (but probably!).

Summary

I fully acknowledge that I am lucky to have had a fairly quick and straight forward labour and I feel grateful for this. However, credit where credit is due - I am very proud of myself and thank the tools that PBC gave me, my amazing body, and my two wonderful birth partners.