Birth story - Becky and baby Harrison

*Trigger warning* - Low lying placenta, testing for Gestational diabetes, PGP (pelvic girdle pain), Hypertension/monitoring for preeclampsia, pressure for induction, failed induction, 2nd degree tear, postpartum hemorrhage.

I know we are told not to apologise for our long birth stories but I have to say it.. Sorry, it's a long one Feel free to skip to ' Labour' at the bottom.

Although the above triggers may read quite worrisome to some, my pregnancy was actually fantastic and my birth was AMAZING!

If I hadn't carried out this course there is no way I would have been able to write that last sentence as my birthing experience would have been very different.

Pregnancy:

We started trying to conceive at the start of 2020 and found out we were expecting in the autumn. We gave our parents the exciting news on my birthday when I was 8 weeks, there was tears of joy all around and it was such a relief to not keep it a secret anymore ♡

The first trimester was pretty straight forward, a little nausea and tiredness but other than that I was able to carry on as normal.

At my 20 week scan we found out I had a low lying placenta which was only 8mm away from my cervix and would require extra scans to monitor this, if I was not more than 2cm by 36 weeks I would need a csection. I didnt think much of this at the time as they said they almost always move.

At some point in the 2nd trimester I developed PGP, some days I would struggle to walk and some days I was fine. I found walking our energetic border collie who pulls on his lead made it worse so I would take him to places he could be off lead if hubby wasn't home to walk him. I was stubborn though and would still go fell walking (you'll find as my pregnancy journey goes on I am stubborn). Sleeping with a pregnancy pillow between my legs helped and using a pregnancy belt was an absolute game changer for the PGP!! I met with a physiotherapist but to be honest that didn't help. One tip she gave me (to sit with one foot higher than the other) actually made things worse so when I called her she said to stop doing it immediately I continued to go to the gym and do light weight lifting which seemed to help (I lifted quite a lot prior to pregnancy). The PGP completely went away by around 36 weeks.

My midwife had booked me in for a gestational diabetes test at 28 weeks because my BMI was 30 at my 8 week appointment. This caused me quite a lot of stress as they then started talking about induction if the test came back as positive. So all of the odds felt as though they were stacked against me and I felt I would never get my natural waterbirth. I was convinced I had Gestational Diabetes (mainly because of my midwife) therefore was going to end up having to be either induced or have a c-section. Thankfully the GD test came back negative.

I had further scans at 27 weeks, 34 weeks and 36 weeks to check if my placenta had moved out of the way of my cervix. At 27 weeks it hadn’t moved. By 34 weeks it was 1.6cm away and I was warned it was unlikely it would move enough to allow for a natural birth so I re watched the c-section videos in this course and began to feel excited again. I created a birth preference document for a natural c-section and thought I'd be meeting my baby at 39 weeks. But, by 36 weeks I was told the placenta had moved by 3 cms!! I couldn't believe it. We were now potentially back on for our water birth

I'd just like to point out that in between all of the medical interventions mentioned above, pregnancy life was fab. I had just joined hubby in the business, we were in the process of selling our little house and we were loving feeling our baby boy move in my belly, hubby would read him stories on a night time and we were just wrapped up in our little pregnancy bubble.

The same day of my 36 weeks scan we moved into our new family home ♡ (why do we always move house right at the end of pregnancy? ) this meant meeting with a new midwife, at a new doctors, in a new(ish) location.

37 weeks onwards:

This is when things became a little stressful but also when this course became absolutely invaluable!! At my midwife appointment she noticed my blood pressure was high, this was at lunch time. She took it again at the end of our appointment and it was still high so referred me to the day ward at the local hospital half an hour away (one I had never been to before). I foolishly hadn't eaten anything that day but she said they would give me some lunch at the hospital. Fast forward to 7pm, they were monitoring my BP every hour and I still hadn’t eaten anything all day. They then told me I had to stay in over night. I was really upset by this as the day had been a whirlwind and completely unexpected. They allowed my hubby to bring me clothes, food, phone charger etc and my anxieties were through the roof. My BP was consistently high even on the meds they gave me but it dropped when my hubby was with me (I do think I suffered from a bit of white coat syndrome). I showed no signs of preeclampsia. The following day at 4pm I was still in the hospital and I was majorly fed up and felt very stressed. I spoke with the registrar and said I would like to discharge myself as I could check my own BP at home now it had stabilised and I was on meds. Two of them agreed whilst the midwife wasn't happy and wanted me to stay In. Discharging myself was absolutely the right thing for me as I was really anxious being on the ward. This was the beginning of advocating for myself as I was adamant I would not be put on the usual conveyor belt of care . I agreed to go in daily for monitoring (this actually helped me feel more at ease come my labour as I knew most of the midwives and care team ). I ended up going to the hospital everyday (bar from 3 days) from 37 weeks to 42 weeks! It became a part of my daily routine and I'd be sure to take snacks and a book with me). It was really lovely to hear my babies heartbeat everyday and learn more about his movements. As soon as he heard his heartbeat he would start kicking like crazy and my whole belly would move, it was super cute he would sometimes get hiccups too, the midwives said he'll likely be a hiccupy baby and sure enough he is. He gets that from his dad .

All was well during my daily checks, sometimes my BP would spike but often when I'd been rushing and I was showing no signs of preeclampsia.

By 39 weeks I was keen to get the ball rolling to try and avoid induction so in the space of just over a week I had 4 sweeps by 3 different midwives. All said I had a bishop score of 7 and I was very favourable. One said she could feel babies head. The dates get a little fuzzy at this point but between 39 and 42 weeks I cancelled 2 inductions and had 1 failed. The first was cancelled because the midwives agreed that baby and I were both happy and healthy so could keep monitoring. The second I had not agreed to in the first place and the 3rd well, this is what I'd class as a failed induction.

I won't go into this too much (feel free to skip to the next paragraph) as I felt it was quite traumatic. I was 40 weeks at this point and had a very short tempered midwife who admitted she hadn't read my notes because she was too busy. When she eventually decided to read my notes and after chatting with a doctor they decided my bishop score was high enough (and the CTG was picking up tightenings) so I could go straight to the ward to have my waters broken. I waited 20 hours for the doctor to arrive to do this, I was knackered. He came in with a trainee doctor and tried to break my waters but couldn't, turns out I wasn't favourable at all and somehow 3 separate midwives had gotten it wrong. One thing the course doesn't prepare you for is how vulnerable you feel when your legs are in the stirrups and how uncomfortable having a speculum inserted is . I had 3 speculums inserted. One to try and break my waters, (which failed), one to insert a balloon (which broke!! Well the handle did and had me in floods of tears as it clamped down on me) and the third and final to insert the balloon which again failed as the doctor said my cervix was so far back (again, completely different to what the midwives said on the day ward). So, they then wanted to do the 24 hour pessary but couldn't be sure it would work. We (hubby and I) asked if we could be left alone to discuss things. We decided we had had enough and wanted to go home. The doctor was happy with this and said he was happy for me to go home, he would book me in for another induction at 41+5 and I only needed to go in to be monitored every 3 days.

Labour

I lost my mucus plug on Friday 30th July and had my bloody show Monday 2nd August (day of induction booking 41+5). At this point you really do start googling how soon labour will start as there was no way in hell I was going in for that induction and wanted to give our baby until the full 42 weeks to make his appearance.

On Tuesday 3rd August I told hubby I was turning off my phone so not to panic if he hadn't heard from me. I closed all of the curtains, put up fairly lights, had a lovely long bath, watched my favourite tv show ‘Outlander’ to get the oxytocin flowing. Oh and I should mention I had been harvesting colostrum and doing nipple stimulation for about a week. Even though it was summer later than night we enjoyed a hot chocolate and I just felt so relaxed and content. I went to bed at 22.30 and at 23.30 I had my first contraction WOOOOOOP. I had been having a few practice contractions for a week or so so I didn't want to give hubby false hope. Looking back, our 10 month old cat knew, each time a contraction started he would jump onto the bed and kneed my face . Come 1am, I told hubby I was having regular contractions and said I was going to run a bath. By about 3am I went downstairs and hubby soon followed, he couldn't sleep and didn't want to leave my side no matter how many times I tried to urge him to get some sleep

In addition to the AMAZING upbreathing, I used the tens machine which worked to an extent but because most of my contractions were in my lower back, hubby rubbing my back was the best. We called the hospital at 7am when the contractions were 3 minutes apart and they said to go in.

The hospital already had copies of our birth preferences and said that they were getting the birth pool room ready for us on our arrival wooop I didn't think I would get the room so hadn't mentioned it. I was so pleased they read our preferences and had a very non hands on approach which I loved! We arrived at the hospital at 7.30am, I was examined some time before lunch and was 3cm, this was the only time I had a VE. I spent the day in and out of the pool. When in the pool I was almost in a trance in between contractions. Basically having micro sleeps which I never thought possible. I lost count of the number of times I almost face planted the water.

My waters broke at 8pm and this is when the contractions ramped up, I thought omg I don't know how much more I can take, what If I'm not progressing, what if I need the induction drip, I'll have to have an epidural etc, basically I was doubting myself and in hindsight I was going through the transition. I said I needed to get back in the pool asap. Within a minute or so of being back into the pool I said 'get the midwife I'm pushing!!!". Hubby looked in disbelief . From this point until the birth I had my eyes closed, hubby says he thought labour had stalled because I wasn't saying or doing much, again It was like I was in a trance, focused on being relaxed and down breathing. I actually had to ask hubby 'remind me what to do' when a contraction started as you can forget about the down breathing when your body wants you to push so intensely. He said "remember your breathing", and it takes all of your concentration to breath baby down calmly.

I barely spoke during the down stage of labour other than when my body started to push and I said, "my bums going to fall out," the odd swear word during the ring of fire and asking for water. Note, once you get the hang of the down breathing it really calms things down and you no longer feel like your bum is going to fall out lol.

As I was birthing his head, the ring of fire was noticeable and looking back at the video I may have lost focus for a split second as I said 'ow', but my hubby said 'remember your breathing Bec, this is the most natural thing in the world'. And In that split second, I was back in the green zone, super chill.

Our gorgeous boy was born at 23.06, just over 24 hours after my first contraction. It was really the most amazing birth and couldn't have been any more perfect. We had lovely skin to skin and delayed cord clamping. We even video called my mum when me and baby were still In the pool .

Postpartum haemorrhage (PPH)

I wont go into this too much as I didn't find it traumatic at all but if you have made it this far, just know, it didn't feel like a panic or a rush. The midwife asked if I wanted the injection to deliver the placenta. I said was happy to take her lead, she said I wasn’t losing much blood so was happy for the placenta to come on it's own. After a while we noticed I was losing more blood when moving out of the pool so the doctors were called in. We delivered my placenta but I had some blood clots that needed flushing which felt uncomfortable so I agreed to go to theatre. They said they could do it under GA and stitch my 2nd degree tear up at the same time. I was happy for this to happen whilst hubby had skin to skin with our new bundle of joy. I just closed my eyes on the way to theatre and felt at ease knowing I was in safe hands and that my baby boy was ok.

Recovery has been a breeze considering the amount of meds I was on post birth and our little lad is blooming amazing!!! We are In fits of giggles every day and I'd do it all again in a heart beat

Whilst pregnancy and labour had its challenges, I felt empowered knowing I was in control of my decisions. My body, my baby. Some doctors, and sometimes some family members, rolled their eyes and tried to make me feel like I was naïve for going on about Hypnobirthing but I absolutely proved them wrong!

Ps, early parenting tips, mum guilt is real, cut yourself some slack. Breastfeeding is freaking tough! Nothing can prepare you for the intensity of it. Dummies are not the devil, they can be your best friend

If you made it this far, thank you for reading!