Can you have sex during pregnancy?

Senior NHS Midwife, Hannah O’Sullivan shares her answer to one of the most Googled questions about pregnancy: is it safe to have sex when you’re pregnant?

Sex in pregnancy is safe and healthy.  Your baby is protected inside their amniotic sac and penetrative sex cannot reach them, whether you are talking penis, fingers or toys.  

There is no clear evidence link between sex and miscarriage - however if you have had recurrent miscarriages you may be advised by your doctor to avoid penetrative sex for the first trimester.  This does not stop you from engaging in other sexual activity that is non-penetrative. You may also be advised to avoid penetrative sex for periods of time if you have vaginal bleeding and/or placenta praevia - but unless you have been expressly advised against it then carry on!  

Having sex will not cause premature labour; but orgasm causes a huge surge in oxytocin, the hormone responsible for uterine surges and so can cause the muscles of the uterus to become tight and firm. These are known as Braxton Hicks, and are harmless. You may also experience them in later pregnancy if you are busy and active, or sometimes with no trigger at all. Orgasm also releases endorphins - powerful chemicals in your brain that make you feel good and decrease pain sensation. A small study found that women in labour with low-levels of endorphins were more likely to request additional pain relief. Building your endorphins through sex or other activites that feel good can support you to enjoy your pregnancy and feel more comfortable. You may even find you are better able to manage the sensations of labour too. 

It may be there are adjustments to be made in terms of the positions that you find comfortable when having sex during pregnancy, so you may need to be more inventive than before. There are plenty of positions, though, that avoid any weight on your bump. You may also find that deep penetration becomes less comfortable. But remember, we are all unique - in pregnancy and out - and so keep listening to your body and communicating openly with your partner(s).

During pregnancy your hormones are different and your body is changing shape everyday. This might make you feel sexy AF, or it might make you feel the complete opposite. Both ends of that spectrum - and everything in between - are totally normal. Sex and feeling sexy is so bound up with our body image and feeling good in our skin, and that can be challenging for some as our bodies shift and expand to grow new life. If you don’t feel like having sex, try to keep open dialogue with your partner; aim for intimacy and connection and don’t worry about whether sex follows or not. Pregnancy is a great time for carving out space as a couple, before the all-consuming needs of a newborn take precedence for a while.  

Being pregnant does not stop you from contracting STIs and infections can have a negative impact, so always practice safe sex and speak with your midwife, GP or sexual health clinic if you are concerned that you have had unprotected sex with someone who may have an STI.  

Do not have oral sex if your partner has cold sores, as they are caused by the Herpes virus, and there is a chance that your baby could develop an illness called Neonatal Herpes which can make them very unwell.

For more sexual happiness tips check out our Five Top Tips video with sex educator Ruby Rare here. 

Written by Senior NHS Midwife, Hannah O’Sullivan

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