Birth story - Zoe and baby Margot

*Trigger warning* - potential large baby risk of death at birth. Graphic photos.

I have included a chunk about the pregnancy purely as it is pivotal in my decision making process.

PREGNANCY:

I started the course after recommendation from a midwife. I didn't have a designated midwife through pregnancy due to staff shortages so was pleased to not be in the dark.

I had some symptoms like sickness until week 16, migraines and PGP along with a bit of bruising to ribs courtesy of baby. Growth chart all over the place due to different person each time.

Measured under 25 weeks and then over from 34 weeks. At 35 weeks I was told to test daily for diabetes as over 90th percentile.

At 36 weeks I was told no diabetes but a very big baby and the consultant pushed for an induction or a section by 37 weeks. I was told baby could die etc . Luckily I used my BRAIN, and so did husband who I asked to come into meeting. We decided I knew my body and my baby and that we would wait it out.

I had extra scans weekly and at 38 weeks I was told baby was actually fine and 75th percentile and no need for high risk but now looked like baby had lost weight so needed scans to check.

Again we used BRAIN and agreed to scans but nothing more. 40 weeks and scan all fine. I refused induction. I was referred to senior midwife at the hospital as my PBC birth plan for a water birth was deemed none standard! Anyway she was lovely and we saw the facilities. She showed me the tools used for induction and explained if given the drip how far my tether would let me go etc. I said I wanted to do nothing either way until at least 41 weeks and possibly 42.

We talked about elective section instead of induction and agreed to book a date for a section for 41 plus 2 just in case baby hadn't come by then as husband works offshore and wouldn't be home for recovery if left any later.

40 plus 6 I had 15 mins of tightenings plus surges in Aldi middle aisle. I went to car but then it subsided and nothing after.

BIRTH:

41+2 surgery day. We checked in at 7.30am and we're taken to room to be prepped. I was one of 3 that day and was 11am surgery. Everything calm and explained and after 2 days of wrestling with my conscience about not giving baby chance to come when she was ready, I was at peace with my decision.

9.30am I was in side room with canula in my arm after fasting all night when I went straight into established labour!

This was a tough ask as I wasn't able to eat or drink so I used my up breathing to get through each surge and the one hand I could grip with I held the wall or bed as I was actively moving around. Husband kept putting cold towels on my neck and for an hour and a half I did this without any checks as staff were in the first surgery. I got a midwife to check baby with doppler as soon as they were free.

Again we had a big decision time but we chatted and used our BRAIN and decided that as my waters hadn't gone and I had been fasting we would go with surgery still and meet our baby, as could be another 12 to 24 hours otherwise. I felt as though baby had told me she was ready to come that day and I wasn't rushing her. Also I feel like I got to experience at least the earlier stages of labour.

We had pushed for a gentle section which this surgeon is an advocate for.

11.30am I was down in theatre breathing through surges until the numbness kicked in. Then my playlist started and the surgeon asked if we were ready as he pinged on his gloves. It was like a scene out of a TV or film! The first song was the recessional song from our wedding Stevie Wonder for once in my life. I felt this sense of readiness. The atmosphere in surgery was amazing. I had some upbeat 80s dance tunes like Erasure on my playlist and songs that make me feel happy. The staff all loved it.

The surgeon asked if I was ready for the curtain drop. I heard my husband half laugh half cry as we saw baby's head just poking out of my tummy. The surgeon said "right now down to you...push for me." It took 8 pushes as he supported baby to get her arms free. Then he said "okay ready for the gender reveal". I was told to reach forward and pull baby up out of my stomach.

I did and we both saw together that we had a baby girl! She was straight to my chest. Then curtain up. Whilst they stitched me up baby found her way straight to my nipple! She was born to Madness it must be love and her first feed was my processional song from the wedding- the Portuguese love theme from Love Actually. All songs just happened to be where the playlist was up to. Baby got some delayed cord clamping as requested and they left it long enough that Dad could still cut the cord.

Baby was covered in poop and turns out she had emptied her bowels inside me prior to birth. Another sign I made the right choice as I don't doubt that had I allowed my waters to go and declined surgery there would have been panic and urgency to get baby out. Although I would have been equipped thanks to the course.

I had various students in the room purely because they don't often get a gentle elective section and everyone wanted to experience what it can be like. I had the most perfect birth and I am so grateful to PBC as I would not have known about any of my options or been informed without it. I would've probably had an early induction at 36 or 37 weeks and baby would have been in neo natal as she would have been far smaller than they thought.

My recovery is going well and at 2 and a half weeks in I am mobile and stitches are healing well. Still breastfeeding too which hopefully we can keep up.

Sorry it is so long but I struggled prior to making my decision to find any elective sections purely by choice. I read all the unplanned sections and none mentioned the gentle or natural section. Hope this helps anyone who may be on the fence in making a decision or is just curious. Thanks again PBC and congrats if you made it to the end. X