Birth story - Sian and baby Finley

I bought the Positive Birth Company book as I started my 2nd trimester and it totally transformed my way of thinking about birth. I went from being nervous and anticipating a lot of pain, to being really excited about my birth. I wanted my husband to fully understand the hypnobirthing process so I also bought the digital pack for us to watch together and discuss. This also made him feel really confident about the birth and his role as birthing partner.

Early labour started for me on Sunday 3rd October at 4am. The contractions never came to a stop but they never reached a regular pattern so I knew it was different from the Braxton Hicks I had the week before. This lasted for 4 days, varying from 5-45 minutes apart. It was very hard to not let frustration take over and I tried so hard to remain calm and focused and kept reminding myself that baby would come when he was ready. I listened to the positive affirmations and guided meditations a lot to keep calm.

During the night on Tuesday 5th they reached an intensity that was causing me to call the midwife for some gas and air to take the edge off even though I was using my up breathing. The midwife wouldn’t come as contractions were only 5 minutes apart and so she recommended a bath and some paracetamol. This helped ease the intensity and I managed to get a few hours sleep. Little did I know I wouldn’t be getting a full nights sleep again for a long time!

The intensity remained during Wednesday 7th and my husband stayed home to support me. I am so glad he did because I knew I would have ended up in a panic and he noticed that I was struggling to focus on the counting so counted each surge with me which helped a lot. The surges were not getting any closer together so at 4.30pm, my friend who is a midwife called to give me some tips on how to speed up early labour. After hanging up, before we even had a chance to try any, I realised I was already in active labour thanks to tracking on the Freya app. I then noticed that my mucus plug had come away. Two hours later we called the midwife and I finally got my gas and air. I stayed on gas and air which helped the intensity hugely and I was still using my up breathing counting with it. I was assessed at 7:30pm and was 4cm dilated. By 8pm, I really needed the pool so hubby started to set that up and I was in before I knew it. He set it up with all the five senses I wanted to keep me calm; essential oils diffusing, LED tea lights around the pool, sound bath meditations playing and he made sure I was still drinking and eating. The snacks I had packed ended being too dry because of the breathing with gas and air but I kept drinking water. The pool and the gas and air helped so much and I continued to labour until 11.40pm when I was assessed again.

However, this was hugely disappointing as she told me I was still 4cm and my membranes were still intact. She broke the waters for me and then checked baby’s heart rate which slowed right down. She mentioned the possibility of heading to hospital if it didn’t pick up. I knew I had to stay calm to help baby so I kept breathing calmly and his heart rate soon went back to normal. As I got back into the pool, I was mentally preparing myself for hours more of labour and so hubby was counting me through the up breathing to get me focused again and reassuring me with positive affirmations.

The breaking of my waters had caused my contractions to intensify and gas and air wasn’t even helping. I had a wobble with the hypnobirthing and screamed a lot that I couldn’t do it. The contractions were so intense and powerful that my whole body was shaking and convulsing. My midwife and husband were amazing and kept reminding me that it’s just a powerful experience and that I could do it and I was doing so well.

Within 45 minutes to an hour I suddenly felt a strong urge to push and it felt like I needed to do the biggest poo of my life. I knew what this meant as I was so prepared from watching the course and immediately a calmness came over me. Without gas and air, I breathed down into each push. I knew I was so close to meeting my baby. I stopped screaming and groaned and breathed deeply instead and I just followed my body’s lead. Within 20 minutes he was crowning and I could feel his head almost out. He went out and slid back a few times and then on the next push he stayed out. It didn’t feel painful, just like I was being stretched for a smear test! I think I can thank the water for this. The second midwife arrived just in time to see the birth! On the next push I was expecting to do two more pushes for his head then his body, but with the next push to my surprise his whole body came out. I was so in shock that he had come out in one push and he was here that I froze. My husband and the midwife had to snap me out of it to get me to pick him up out of the water. I reached down and pulled him into my arms still not fully believing he was here and I had done it.

I just remember seeing his beautiful eyes gazing at me and being utterly mesmerised. I was helped out of the pool and onto the sofa for our golden hour. We had delayed cord clamping, dad cut the cord, skin to skin and I chose to have the injection for the placenta to reduce blood loss. It came so quickly with a little gas and air and then baby was passed to dad for skin to skin whilst I was stitched up for a tear. I couldn’t believe I had torn because I couldn’t feel it at all. I used my breathing again and gas and air while I was stitched up to keep calm and to not prevent the flow of oxytocin.

We tried to tempt baby to breast but he struggled to suck after latching so we had him looked at for his post birth checks before trying again. However, his breathing hadn’t slowed and regulated enough so the midwife stayed an extra hour to see if he managed to regulate it. Unfortunately he didn’t and so the doctors requested we went into the post natal ward where he was put on antibiotics with a canula in his arm. I couldn’t believe hours after my dream home birth coming true that we were now bundling into the car to go to hospital with our hours old baby. We were both so tired and sleep deprived and just wanted to snuggle in bed as a new family so it was hugely disappointing. But, we continued to use our B.R.A.I.N technique from positive birth company in hospital as we faced decisions about his care. Although being in hospital was tough, watching my baby being tested continuously day and night he did it all with no fuss and I tried to see the positive in everything thanks to the course preparing us to stay calm in all unexpected situations. Being in hospital meant I got extra support with breast feeding and felt so much more confident with it than had I just been left to my own devices at home and it also gave us the chance to spend 5 days just staring at and absorbing our little miracle. I looked around the clinical hospital room and it made me so grateful that I hadn’t had to birth in a hospital environment and I kept recalling how perfect my home birth was for me and what a powerful experience it had been.

Thank you to the positive birth company for this amazing support and I recommend that ALL mums use it to feel truly empowered about their birth.