Birth story - Rosa and baby Theodore

*Trigger warning* - use of the word contraction, long early labour, episiotomy, forceps delivery, reduced movements.

--- Pregnancy ---

As a first time mum I wanted to be as prepared as possible for labour and birth. Baby was a surprise and I was determined to ensure I was educated on my birth rights. I practiced hypnobirthing from about 12 weeks ish, breathing and mediation every evening. I followed the advice from the PBC course including watching and listening to positive birth stories and creating a birth “plan”.

I didn’t particularly enjoy pregnancy, had all the usual symptoms, but looked forward to labour and birth. I had a low risk pregnancy with no complications and planned for home birth.

--- Labour & Birth ---

At 40 weeks and 1 day my waters broke very dramatically like on a Hollywood film literally soaking through numerous rugs, pads and anything else! We were planning home birth so became very excited and started setting up however contractions didn’t start for about 3/4 hours after this. Advice from the home birth team was to do all the relaxing things to bring on labour. I could continue to have my home birth as long as established labour happens and baby begins to arrive in 24 hours. I felt very positive about this once contractions started, practiced my up breathing, affirmations etc. I found that the UFO position didn’t actually work for me to get contractions moving and I was having more contractions either relaxed in the bath, or lying on one side with my hypnobirthing tracks on.

Unfortunately baby decided to be difficult and didn’t move much at all the next morning so we went in to triage for this. All was well and the home birth midwife on call came with us and spoke to the consultant. Although baby was fine and I was contracting well the consultant advised we birth in hospital, however my midwife argued against this as we still had hours to go before the risk of infection from waters going began to sneak in. At this stage I was talking through contractions, happy that baby was fine and excited about home birth. The midwife asked if I would like an examination just to see if my cervix was beginning to dilate to determine the likelihood of home birth going ahead. I felt this was a wise decision and the exam was completely painless - I was so excited to find out I was 5/6cm!!

At this stage I was using my tens machine which was an absolute life saver. Contractions were also very regular about 3 mins apart so we were hopeful that baby would make an appearance soon. Once we got home contractions died down a bit but I continued to do what made me relax and felt on such a high I asked the midwife why I felt like I was on drugs she said this was due to my oxytocin levels. I lit my candles used my positive affirmation cards and just loved every second of being at home.

When evening hit it became clear I wouldn’t get my home birth as baby wasn’t showing signs of being here soon as risk of infection was increasing. I had created a birth preference sheet using the PBC sample and I turned to this when speaking to the new midwife on call with us. She explained that the hospital would organise an ambulance and we would be given a private room on delivery suite, with it being very likely the consultant would want to use the hormone drip to bring me to the end of labour and bring baby into the world. I had thought about the hormone drip previously and really was anxious about what this would mean (monitoring; lack of mobility; more intense contractions). My midwife said that as I was so close to meeting baby, had got this far with no actual medication other than paracetamol she would really recommend the hormone drip (small amount) along with my breathing and all the other techniques I was doing to stay calm. She was very supportive of me and my preferences but my mind was open and I decided to go with this plan rather than request an elective c section (this was in my original birth preference due to fear of hormone drip). I felt empowered to make this decision and although I was nervous about going to hospital I knew I was close to meeting my baby.

I brought my tea lights with me to hospital and used my up breathing in the very bumpy ambulance ride. The ride was amazing for bringing in more regular and stronger surges. The midwife at hospital read my notes and was very supportive, clearly I wasn’t going to have the calm water birth I wanted but she respected our choices for dimmed lights and she didn’t offer any pain meds. I quickly changed my mind on this because I was much less comfortable and therefore felt more pain than at home. I opted for gas and air but this interrupted my up breathing so I only used it once.

Contractions really ramped up and I spoke up about not really feeling that I needed the hormone drip due to this.

Unfortunately, I had no urge to push after being in hospital for 10 hours + and although I was happy the risk of infection increased. Forced pushing was tried which was not a preference of mine but I had an intense pressure in my bum and back which caused me extreme discomfort and made labour no longer as manageable. Now we know this was baby’s head being in a very awkward position in the cervix and stopping him coming naturally. This for me was the only part of my birth story I found difficult and I said “I can’t do this”. However I felt so so supported by the medical team and was reminded time and time again I was doing it!

When I asked for pethadine I felt like a failure but I now know this is ridiculous as I was in an intense amount of pain. The forced pushing helped baby move into a position which made forceps delivery possible without this effort on my part my baby would have needed an emergency c section. I got to fully dilated using my breathing techniques, tens machine and staying calm.

I did feel scared about the epidural and assisted birth but at that stage I had been pushing for over 2 hours and my baby’s health was priority. Baby Theo was born after 3 contractions and pushes in theatre.

I wanted to share my story as I want to reassure mums that even if the birth changes and medicalised birth might be needed, this can still have aspects of your birth preferences. We had skin to skin, my partner cut cord etc. I would also say 100% to write your preferences, our team were so supportive of ours, hospital environment can be scary but I never felt rushed to make decisions and the procedure itself didn’t feel as much as an emergency as it actually was. I also 100% would not change my plan to home birth as the beginning of labour was magical I feel this environment encouraged labour to progress in the early stages and kept me and baby calm.