Birth story - Lupita and baby Hekate

*Trigger warning* - Mentions word hospital and epidural.

It took me awhile to write my birth story I have been so in love with my new bundle of joy.

This is our first child and we were very excited when we conceived her, my husband wanted a girl and that's what he got. I didn't mind either way I just wanted to be a mom.

We are high school sweethearts we got together November 11th 2008, married September 14th 2019 and conceived our baby May 18th 2020 (She was planned).

Everyone always has their ‘two cents worth’ and through my whole pregnancy I was being told so many negative things about my birth plan. People would ask where I plan on having her and when they found out it was not at a hospital they automatically started with negative stories. When they found out I planned on doing a non-medicated birth (without epidural) they made me feel like I was making the wrong decision and told me things like, ‘the pain is going to be as if I am getting my bones broken,’ and sarcastically told me, ‘You’re brave,’ said that they wouldn't be able to do it without an epidural and I should rethink it since it's my first one. This was family, friends and even strangers!

My mind was set on my birth plan I talked to my midwife about all the negative stories and she recommended https://courses.thepositivebirthcompany.co.uk, the affirmations made me feel more confident in my birth plan and reassured me that I could do it because my body is made to birth my baby. My husband and I listened to the lectures and took away positive affirmations that he said to me during labor he even massaged my body and reassured me that I was able to do it.

The day before my labor started I went for a hike with my dogs. The next day at 2am I started to get contractions (we called them surges) my husband texted my doula (I highly recommend one especially if it's your first birth) my husband had an area in our house set for my surges. I was on a recliner in front of a fire he lit and I had lavender and sage scents, some water and hot tea next to me. My doula came at around 6am and she helped soothe me. The surges felt like a rollercoaster going high to the top and then going down, letting me relax. I reminded myself with each surge I was that much closer to having my daughter in my arms.

As 8pm rolled around there was still no baby. I was only 5 dilated so my midwife gave me two options she asked me if I would like to go to the hospital, as they could give me an epidural to ease the surges, but right away I protested because that was not my plan. The second option was to stay at home and ride it out and then to call her when I felt the baby was coming. I chose the second option and my husband ran me a warm bath, he used feathers to soothe my body.

I got out but the surges came on stronger and I felt as if I had to poop. I sat on the toilet (which felt so good by the way) but nothing came out so I finally headed to bed around 2am. That morning, around 5am, things got intense, I jumped in the shower again because the warm water felt amazing. I started to let out loud cow noises and I felt as if she wanted to come but I could still feel her in my upper right rib. My husband suggested we go to the hospital but I was instant on doing my birth plan. My midwife called to check on me and my husband told her what was happening, so she asked for me to come in to the midwifes office.

As soon as I got in the car I couldn't sit, I had to hunch over the seat and I felt my body pushing. When we got there I landed on the couch and pushed and said, "something is coming out." They checked and it was my water bag. It came out as a water balloon, I felt as if I had a nut sack between my legs!

I was instructed to get in the pool but, as they monitored her heartbeat they noticed it dropped each time I pushed so I was instructed to get out of the pool and to go to the bed. I got to the bed and I began to push. My husband lifted my leg and with three big pushes I felt babies head come out. They gave me oxygen and I pushed one big push and her body came out. They laid her directly on me and she was perfect, we did skin-to-skin and I immediately breastfed her.

My Placenta came shortly after but I kept bleeding so the midwife had to pull the blood clots out of me which was very uncomfortable, more uncomfortable than the actual birth.

The breathing affirmations and courses that I took really helped during the pushing phase, I didn't even tear. I kept her connected to the umbilical cord until it was drained and that is when we cut it. The whole time during my labor my doula was keeping me hydrated, when I felt nauseated she let me smell peppermint essential oil, she kept rubbing my back and even giving me bits of food to keep my energy up. The whole time during my labor I kept repeating "This is Amazing" my birth was beautiful. The music we had playing was, ‘Nothing Else Matters’ by Metallica my daughter was born at 10:59 a.m.

My advice for new mothers is not to let anyone dictate what you choose to do with your body and your birth. You can do anything you put your mind to and that goes for ALL mothers who are going to give birth.

A Big thank you to theses two beautiful amazing women for helping bring my child into this world. I highly recommend both of them.

Midwife Tesa Kurin

Doula Erin Behning