Birth story - Louise and baby Florence

*Trigger Warning* - given pethedine when shouldn't have been, PPH, first stage of induction (pessary).

Pregnancy:

Disclaimer - I did not enjoy pregnancy. I did not glow. I did not love the movements and kicking and I did not love the way my body was changing. I felt sick 24/7 for 9 months and was adament I wouldn't be doing it again. I would happily give birth several times over feeling pregnant. That being said, we were fortunate to have a relatively straight forward pregnancy. She was head down from 30 weeks, a few reduced movements resulted in a growth scan but all was fine and my blood pressure etc was always as it should be. For that, I am extremely thankful.

Labour/birth:

I am a teacher and it was still at a time when working from home was advised so I was quite lucky in that I could be on my bed, laptop on lap, clicking away. This meant I had planned to start my mat leave 1 week before my DD - something I know I wouldn't have managed if I was physically teaching in school.

In hindsight I now see that I went into the first stage of labour on the Monday and tried really hard to continue working, which I did till Wednesday night. But it was very stop, start and anticlimactic. On the Tuesday I felt nothing so thought I'd just had a few cramps on the Monday and was a bit disheartened as I was definitely ready to no longer be pregnant. Wednesday the cramps came back and I was so tired and ended up sleeping most of the day so messaged my boss Thursday morning to say I needed to start my maternity leave then or go off sick. I was due to start my maternity leave the following day (Friday) anyway as I'd tried to work as close to my DD as possible.

Friday night my waters broke but I didn't even realise. I went for a 'make sure' wee before dinner and as I sorted myself out in the loo I saw blood on the paper.. the blood wasn't dripping out but was continuously on the paper so, naturally, a thousand thoughts went through our heads and we frantically rang triage. They were incredibly calm about it and asked me lots of questions around water and leaking etc to which I replied no to all of them. Their calmness made my partner and I relax and they asked me to come in a few hours later when they said she wouldn't be as busy. We were taken aback that they would not want to see a heavily pregnant, bleeding woman asap but trusted the system.

When we arrived, again we were asked if my waters had broken, I was adamant they hadn't but they asked to check the pad I was wearing anyway. To our surprise, the midwife said they thought they had and asked to do an internal exam. I was so shocked and confused so I agreed as I really wanted to know what was going on. As soon as the exam started I felt a woosh and said something like 'oooo it's a bit wetter down there now' I saw her hands covered in bloody water and worried but she said that this was really common. The little swab came up straight away that confirmed my waters had broken.

I wasn't having any contractions and said immediately that I wanted to go home to let labour start naturally. They agreed and because I was so adamant and because of the time of day, instead of waiting 24 hours to book me in they gave me around 36 hours till I was booked to be induced. Frankly, I was devisated and we spent Saturday doing every trick in the book to get labour to start naturally but with no luck. Not a single contraction or cramp. Nothing.

16th January:

I came in for my appointment Sunday at 9am and had mentally got my head around that I was going to be induced and had the 'it is what it is' attitude and to make the best of it that we could. We sat on the bed playing our favorite card games and really laughing as my memory was shocking and I was forgetting simple words etc... It was so weird. We really, really laughed and the midwives made comments about not seeing people like this usually.. to which I put down to this group!!!

I then was examined at 11.30am. Somehow I was 2cm but 'strechable to 4cm' and just hadn't felt anything happen. I was given a few options and went for a pessary. 6 minutes after it had been put in, I was contracting away. This is apparently uncommonly quick, to the point where when I was in a lot of pain, they ovbiously thought I was exaggerating when moaning about pain relief so they took their time. They were doing a shift handover so no one would come when my partner was advocating that I was really in constant pain so I got myself to the toilet and laboured away on there for about 30 mins... the pessary fell out into the toilet and I was having just 1 long contraction.. no waves in sight. I was insistent I needed a little something to take the edge off and asked for some pethedine so the nurse took me back to my bed (I was still on the day ward at this point, surrounded by other woman) and I was hooked up to the monitor and given pethedine. THEN and they examined me. This is when they realised that actually I'd dilated 'extremely' quickly (I had got to 7cm within the hour) and all of a sudden my bed was being run out of the ward and into the labour ward. I don't remember an awful lot as it's a blur due to the pethedine but Sam said the midwife realized she shouldn't have given me pethedine before examining me and I was all of a sudden in the labour ward.

It is now about 2.30 and within an hour of being in the labour ward, I realized I was mooing and asked what the situation was, the midwives said... You're already pushing... I wasn't really aware.. and I think about 10minutes later Flo was born at 4.05pm. From first contraction to birth it was just over 4 hours... However due to them not realising I was in active labour for some time, they have documented labour as 2 hours 35 minutes.

Unfortunately, because I was given pethedine when I shouldn't have been, given the speed I was dialating without it, they needed to monitor the baby's heart rate but found it difficult externally so needed to attach a monitor to the top of her head whilist still inside me. I didn't really feel this and actually completely forgot about it till my partner told me that evening. Another result of this was that as Flo came out very quickly, she needed some help getting the mucus out of her throat so Sam very quickly cut the cord and she was taken away to have it suctioned. I'm quite sad I didn't get the delayed cord clamping and skin to skin but I'm hindsight, it really doesn't feel like the end of the world given the circumstances.

Sam did skin to skin as my placenta was being a rascal and wouldn't come out, even with the injection. I did end up having to have a doctor come in and they had to give my placenta a push and pull to come out. Due to the quick birth, I did suffer from a PPH so I was unable to stand for a few days without fainting, meaning I had to stay in the hospital for a few days, have a catheter fitted and be passed Flo by staff or Sam.

Some takeaways:

During my birth, it's true what people say, your body just finds a position you are comfortable in and you just go with it. I gave birth on my hands and knees on the floor and didn't want to be moved to anywhere else. My midwives in the labour room were phenomenal, they just let me do what I needed to do. Sam said that they quickly reliased what was helpful and what wasn't and totally went with me.

Because of this course, I felt like Sam was my equal during the birth. He was my advocate. He was my hero. He did everything and didn't do everything I needed. I wholey believe that my birth went the way it did because of what we knew. That knowledge is power. It kept me so, so calm and when things happened, instead of worrying or feeling out of control, I recognized where I was in the process of labour and felt excited and informed. I just felt calm the whole way through. I have shouted about this community from the rooftops since! I do wish I had some photos of me labouring but because it all happened so quickly, no one thought to take any. Next time, I will hope to have a camera set up so I can watch one of the most incredible events in the world.

Thank you. Thank you for writing all of your birth stories on here. I read 10+ a night for over a month before I was due. I think this helped the most as I read the vastly differening experiences and knew they all turned out positively!

Flo is 7 months now. Madness. Her calm, chill and happy temperament is constantly commented on and I also thank this community for helping this be the case, through having a positive and calm birth.