Birth story - Laura and baby Ryan

*Trigger Warning* - Overdue, Baby Monitoring in Hospital, Talk of Sweep & Induction, Vaginal Examinations, Small Perineum Graze.

I read so many of these Positive Birth Stories throughout my pregnancy, which gave me strength & confidence ... I hope mine will do the same for someone.

Due 1st Oct - weirdly had similar timings to my previous birth (4 days late, tightenings started around 3-4pm, on Labour Ward by 4-5am)

Build Up -

On & off tightenings started on Monday 3rd Oct, very infrequent, so I took no notice of them really. I had to go in for monitoring as babies heart rate was high at my 40+2 midwife appointment that morning & wouldnt come down. Whilst on the monitor, babies heart decided to have a questionable Deceleration, Midwives called the consultant to take a look, who wanted me to go back the next day for more monitoring to make sure baby was ok & also booked me in for an induction on the 9th Oct when I would be 40+8 (which I really didn't want, I stated that I wanted to wait at long as I could before intervention, but the consultants take was baby is cooked, so to limit any risks, lets get baby out. To say I was gutted was an understatement & I started to get a bit disheartened as we had planned a homebirth this time) When my Husband picked me up from the hospital, he could see my anxeity had kicked in, so he ramped up the oxytocin that night with candles, room sprays, lights & good TV to watch, which helped me destress & get back to green.

So we went back in for more monitoring on Tues 4th Oct - because of my anxeity the previous day, my Husband came with me. We had decided to ask for the induction to be pushed backwards to the maximum NHS Guidance allows (which is 40+12). The Midwife was absolutley lovely on the Day Ward. She read through all my notes & questioned why the consultant had booked me for induction so soon, when I wanted a home birth, so she moved it back for me to Thurs 13th Oct (40+12) no questions asked or reasons needed, which instantly made me feel better! Baby was fine after the second lot of monitoring, with me being over due & declining a stretch & sweep that day, the Midwife had to call the consultant again to discuss potential risks with us (I felt like this was to see if we were switched on & sensible tbh) the Consultant was happy with baby & me, but reinforced that I MUST call if anything at all changes, no matter how small! We agreed & they let me head home to continue with our original home birth plan. I love that I felt so supported with our wishes. Even though it was hard to stand our ground & decline the stretch & sweep & push back the induction, it felt like the right thing to do. We went to pick our Toddler up from Pre-school & really ramped up the oxytocin again that night as a family.

Labour -

Wed 5th Oct - After the stress of being back & forth to the Hospital for the past 2 days, I finally got to chill out. A normal day, I took my Toddler to Pre-school, did some yoga & bounced on my ball with my fave Netflix series. At about 11am, I had a very slight bloody show (my discharge was tinged pink with a small mucus part of blood) which I presumed meant my cervix was finally shifting, yay! I told Hubby, who got excited & we went for a walk. Came back & continued with the ball & relaxing before picking my Toddler up. When we got home & were all together, my Husband & Toddler surprised me with a Blue Topaz Celestial necklace (I honestly believe this is what kickstarted the real surges into action, like a talisman of sorts. The rush of oxytocin was unreal. I put the necklace on & haven't taken it off since Blue Topaz also represents inner stength which I felt in abundance as the hours went by!)

At around 4pm, I started having tightenings again, a bit more frequently this time, that I actually took notice of them & practiced my Upbreathing. We carried on with our routine with our toddler (tea, bath & bed) The tightenings were still coming, but I was able to read through my sons bedtime stories without getting too distracted. I was starting to think they may just be Braxton Hicks, with me being so in control of them & things were just practicing.

By 8pm, I was having them 1 in 10, so we started to get some of the homebirth bits unpacked & set the living room up with our candles, mood lighting, room scents & watched some live music concerts on YouTube (The 1975, Harry Styles, Arctic Monkeys etc) as we love live music. I also stuck my TENS Machine on my back ... best thing ever!!

Once I hit 1 every 8mins, around 10pm, we asked our best friend to head over to take care of our Toddler, so we could concentrate on the surges & get in the zone a bit more. I thought it would throw me off a bit, having someone else turn up, but it was lovely having one of my best friends there. We chatted about random stuff n before we knew it, it was 2am & our toddler was needing to be settled. So she went up to him & left us to it.

I found myself loosing myself more & more into the surges when they came. I found standing up to be a lot more comfortable, as sitting on my ball felt like an electric shock everytime one came. So I hung off my husbands shoulders, whilst he hugged me & told me I was doing great (weirdly it was his smell/aftershave that really grounded me through the surges ... random I know)

By 4am, Freya was telling us we had hit the magical 3 in 10, so we made the call. As things could happen pretty quick, with it being my second. Plus, I wanted to know if our Maternity Unit could facilitate a Homebirth, so we could properly get set up. Unfortunately, when my Husband made the call, they told us they couldn't & asked us to make our way down to the Labour Ward to be checked.

So we tidied up the living room ready for our Toddler in the morning. Said goodbye to our best friend & made our way over. The car journey was OK, I only had 1 surge to deal with. However when we got there, we realised we had forgotten the baby bag (too busy thinking about what our Toddler would need, rather than what we needed) so had to head home again. Thankfully, its only a 15min drive, plus it gave me time to progress further. I had a horrible feeling that I wasn't far enough along & that they would send us home.

The second car journey to the hospital was a whole different ball game, I had 4 surges which were uncomfortable to say the least. But instantly eased when we were taken to our room, which our midwife Sue had set up. Honestly it was beautiful, she had put fake candles, a star projector, incense diffuser & dimmed the lights, it honestly felt like a hotel room with a beautiful high top bath in the center & a super comfy bed. I couldnt believe it. A total Home from Home. Win!

It was 5am by this point, Sue was amazing, she chatted to us about our preferences, asked my Husband how I was at home, explained that once I felt comfortable in the new location the surges should pick up again. She watched me have a couple of surges & asked if she could do a VE to see how my cervix was doing. I agreed, as I wanted to know too & it gave us a starting point at least.

She said we were an easy 3 currently stretching to 4, I had a surge whilst she was doing the VE, so she really could tell what was happening in there. She brought me some Co-codamol to take the edge off & even brought my Husband a coffee too. Then she left us alone for them to ramp up & said she would check in on us again at 6.30am but to push the call button if we needed her before then. It honestly felt like I was in a hotel. We were left alone.

I got undressed, ramped the TENS machine up a couple of notches & walked around. My Husband put our baby playlist on, we danced, sang & just moved. Again, me hanging off my Husband whilst he hugged me n gave light touch massage during the surges. I literally just buried my head in his jumper & breathed.

By 6.30am, I felt like I needed something extra, they were getting more intense, so I was sure I was progressing & was eager to meet my Baby Boy. Sue came in to check us, viewed some of my surges & gave me my admission band on my arm. She said she was finishing her shift unfortunately, but she brought a little knitted hat in with her for encouragement and left it on the table. She said she could see I had progressed & had no doubt I was in active labour now. She wished us luck & went to hand over to the next midwife, Abbie.

At 7.15am, Abbie came in to introduce herself, she again viewed some of my surges, just quietly in the background, letting me do what I needed to do. She asked if she could do another VE to check what's going on. Again, I agreed cause I was certain I had progressed quite a bit & I needed that Entinox to take the edge off!

She told us we were 4cm, I was gutted. How could I only be 4cm. All that intense effort, I was even struggling to stand up through my surges now. She was happy for us to stay but did ask if we wanted a home birth she could see if anyone was now available to facilitate it. We agreed to stay in, the room was perfect & it was less disturbance for our Toddler at home. She was happy we were staying. She went to get the mouth piece for the Entinox & I really had a wobble. I couldn’t believe it, how was I only 4cm ... WTF!

My husband now tells me, he feels that she might have held a little bit back about how quickly things can ramp up, to give me a kick up the butt & the drive to really get my body going. Because from this point everything went a bit crazy fast.

I originally wanted a waterbirth but felt better moving & walking which really surprised me, but my legs were getting tired. I was coming up to 12 hours of walking & moving around since my 'twinges' has started the previous day & I hadn't slept either. So for some reason, I thought it would be a good idea to climb up the bed, facing the back in a bit of a supported child's pose ... & didn't move!

I lost track of time at this point, I went totally in on myself, was barely aware or listening to anyone in the room. My husband was at the side of me, giving me the Entinox, apparently I told him to stop touching my bump when he was doing the soft touch massage he said he knew things were starting to really ramp up. Abbie the midwife came back in at some point around 8.30am my Husband thinks & never left again. She was monitoring babies heart beat at regular intervals, but it wasn't obtrusive, she just let me get on with it & worked around me. My husband kept giving me Lucozade to get me to have a break from the Entinox, cause I was tooting on it like it was going out of fashion.

I felt my body instinctively going into down breathing, I heard someone mention transition & that I needed sugar & I asked if the back of the bed could be lifted so I could hold on to the handrails (clearly my brain was thinking gravity!) & then the mooing started! I have no idea where those noises came from but I tried to focus on sending my breath down, rather than out as noise

At one point I felt a sharp pain in my left hip (Midwife told us afterwards that this could have been baby turning in my pelvis) My Husband said I seemed more determined & didn't have as big of a 'I can't do this' this time round ... (which I massively had with my first birth as I ended up on my back with my legs being supported in the air). I could feel, almost visualise, everything widening as he was coming down. It was surreal. There was a couple of surges where not much happened, so Abbie tried to get me to have a wee ... my body had other ideas ... no time for a wee, head incoming! I think my waters may have broke at this point, I felt a lot of fluid crash around my legs ... as they hadn't gone before & he didn't arrive in the sac. But non of us actually know when they went.

That ring of fire really is something else, I could hear both Abbie & my Husband saying to just breath & pant, take a second. I really tried to concentrate on this but again my body had other ideas, another surge & his head was out. My husband was in shock & he could see the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck, also one of his hands too (baby came out like Superman!)

I could hear Abbie telling me to breath & pant to get the shoulders out (it was like a distant voice floating in the background) next surge came, shoulders & body was out, Baby Boy was between my legs. I picked him up. What the hell, I had done it! It was 9.30am. I had gone from 4cm to birth in 50mins! (That's what it says on my discharge notes - 50min unassisted, spontaneous, vertical labour!)

My placenta wasn't hanging around either, that was already halfway out before I had chance to lay down with baby on my chest (Gravity really is your friend!) Unfortunatly because it was already halfway out they had to move pretty fast (they were trying to unwrap the ridiculously long umbilical cord from around babies neck 4x! & get him crying as he was a bit in shock with the speedy birth, catch the placenta that was coming out & get me laid down resting). We wasn't able to have a long delayed cord clamping, maybe 10-15mins. But everyone was safe & that's all that mattered. Our Son finally gave out his first cry & I managed to get myself laid down comfy with him on my chest for our skin to skin. Abbie checked me over, no tears just one small graze on my perineum. She commented & said 'I breathed him out beautifully & made it look easy'. I felt like Superwoman! She then left us to our golden hour, with tea & toast ... it was bliss.

We were back home for 2.30pm & introducing Zac to his new Baby Brother Ryan

What a whirlwind!! We are now adjusting to life as a family of 4

My Thoughts & Birth Preperations -

• Watch the PBC Hypnobirthing course for the second time, refreshing my memory to feel confident in myself & my body

• I started perineum massages at 35w every other day, then every day once I hit 39w.

• I drank Raspberry Leaf Tea from 36w gradually upping it to every day once I hit 40w.

• Believe in yourself! Positive affirmations! You can do this & stand your ground. I felt strong knowing my Husband was behind me all the way with my choices, even when we had to push back at the possible interventions.

• This is my second time doing the PBC Hypnobirthing course & my 2 'active labour' parts couldnt have been more different. I felt more confident this time, listening to what my body needed & just went with it.

• We both feel that maternity care has also evolved in the last 3 years. We went to the same labour ward & the rooms/midwives couldn't have been more different. We felt they were trying to replicate home birth scenarios, stay in the background more until it was go time & I needed that extra bit of support. Midwives really are Angels.