Birth story - Jess and baby Jamie

*Trigger Warning* - premature rupture of membranes (PROM) (38 weeks) and no contractions.

I planned a home birth with my first and despite giving birth in hospital, I really enjoyed the planning process so decided to give it another go second time around, knowing that a positive birth can be achieved with the right tools in any setting.

My pregnancy was completely low risk and I was lucky to have no complications. Pregnancy is not my season, I very much survive not thrive and I had a toddler and house move to contend with this time around so needless to say I felt very negative and tired throughout and couldn’t wait to have a baby, especially as I knew this was our last (we always knew 2 children would complete our family). I had a remote doula as I knew I needed help getting in the ‘zone’ this time around, with a toddler and a house move I just needed some help focussing on my pregnancy and planning my birth.

I went on mat leave and was very much looking forward to having some time to nap, batch cook, pack bags etc so I was very surprised when at 38 weeks my waters went whilst pumpkin picking 🎃. It was less of a gush and more of a gradual flow that slowly soaked me through. After a slight panic as I hadn’t done any of my planned preparations, I came to terms with baby being here a bit sooner than we thought and we got excited and ready to give birth!

My home birth team came out and confirmed it was my waters, and we said goodbye to my little girl and told her the baby in mummy’s tummy was coming. If only this was the case! Despite a few very mild cramps, it was clear labour was not starting as hoped, and I had to have many discussions with my home birth team and consultants to decide what do to next.

After discussing the risks and associated research with my doula, I decided to decline the recommended induction and antibiotic IV and agreed to have monitoring over the next few days to check on baby and keep an eye out for any signs of infection (of which there were none). My midwives also advised to decline any vaginal examinations as these increase the risk of infection so I agreed to this.

I could feel my baby moving around inside of me and I knew he was safe and happy and had full faith in my body, and I wanted to give my baby time for him to come on his own terms.

I went in for monitoring every alternate day and was on look out for any change in movements or signs of anything being wrong. Myself and the baby were absolutely fine and I spent the next few days trying to relax and do oxytocin boosting activities to help things get started on their own. This became increasingly difficult with the overriding pressure from the health care system to be induced. I had to have many difficult conversations consultants who quoted completely irrelevant statistics in an attempt to scare me into having an immediate induction.

After one week, it seemed that labour still wasn’t imminent and unfortunately despite the unwavering support from my husband and doula, and some midwives I met along the way, the pressure amounted to be too much and I agreed to be admitted for an induction. My doula was absolutely key here as instead of dwelling on the natural birth I envisioned, she helped me take control of the situation and stay strong with my preferences over my environment and my rights.

I had my waters broken on the midwife led unit and had monitoring on this unit also (all I had to do was ask!). This meant that I had a bigger room with different resources that allowed me to feel relaxed. My doula gave us an amazing birth kit which my husband used which had a light, diffuser, oils in etc so we got to work turning our room into a sanctuary.

After my waters were broken it was evident that there was LOTS of water still intact, and it was likely that at pumpkin picking it was my hind waters and not fore waters that had leaked. My body did then start to progress on its own, however it was slow and at this point I was struggling being away from my daughter, felt very tired and wanted the baby to be here. I felt that I had given him enough extra time so agreed to the drip.

Very small details made a huge difference here. I had no idea you can ask for the cannula to be on the inside of your elbow not your hand (I found it to be super uncomfortable in my hand for my first birth) so I did this and it was hidden underneath my dressing gown which made me feel more like a human and not a patient. I requested a mobile monitor so I could move around whilst the midwives could listen to the baby. Unfortunately the mobile monitor wasn’t available but I knew I had a right to move around so made this clear to my midwife who was very understanding. As it happens, I didn’t want to move around at all!

When the drip started I was 4 cm and things were already ramping up. I laid on my side breathing (and shouting) through each contraction, squeezing my comb (which I absolutely recommend!) and when I felt they were getting too intense and close together I asked for the drip to be stopped and that is what happened.

After 3 hours of intense surges I knew I needed to stand up and start to push. I basically became a ferocious animal at this point and my body completely took over and I gave birth to our baby boy on my knees. It was absolutely beautiful and incredible but equally the hardest and most intense thing I have ever been through!

Jamie latched almost straight away and we had a lovely hour of skin to skin. I declined the injection as it made me very sick with my first birth, however after an hour my placenta had not come and I agreed to this. Everything came away beautifully and my baby was finally here!!

Once again this birth was not as I had ‘planned’ but being educated through the PBC course and having access to my doula (through WhatsApp!!) helped me to stay in control and feel empowered. Birth is NOT just about delivering your baby, it’s so much more and by knowing your body and your rights you really can give yourself the best chance of a beautiful positive birth.

Explore More From The Positive Birth Company

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Download our virtual birth partner app, FREYA, the app will coach you through every surge whilst keeping track of your progress.