Birth story - Jade and baby boy

I can only begin this ‘story’ by writing that our birth was everything we had hoped for, and more. It was INCREDIBLE!

Pregnancy surprised me! My body felt stronger than ever throughout and with lockdown, my mind was given the breathing space to be calm and prepare for birth alongside my husband.

At our 36 week scan we were told our baby was measuring too big, there was potential for gestational diabetes and that induction before 40 weeks was necessary. I was alone in this appointment like many mums to be during this pandemic and completely overwhelmed with the information and the ‘pressure’ I felt to agree to their birth plan. I am, as always, incredibly grateful for my husband who encouraged me to keep believing in my body and to use our ‘brain’, as the PBC book guided us, for the next few weeks ahead. The teams around us continued to push for the induction, we even received the infamous line ‘let’s get baby out for Christmas’, but we saw no risks and remained confident in my body and it’s ability to do what it needed for the safe arrival of our baby when ready.

7 days past ‘due date’ on the 24th December at 1.30am, surges began! The excitement took over and we began preparing for that car trip to the hospital, only for the surges to stop. That evening they returned again, but much further apart and with a lower intensity. We called our birth centre for some guidance, with their encouraging response of ‘enjoy your Christmas, cook and be merry and just be happy at home. Baby is coming’. And that we did. We toasted our final Christmas together as just us two and waited for the excitement to start again.. Christmas evening.

We stayed together at home for as long as possible, until my waters broke early afternoon on Boxing Day. This was it!!

Arriving at the birth centre was a surreal experience. We had been waiting patiently for this moment and I savour every second of us walking excitedly ... with surges stopping us in our tracks.. from the car park and through the corridor to the entrance doors. After an examination we were taken to our room, where we instantly felt at ease and free. Whilst my husband prepared the room, I started positioning myself over a very large cushion on the bed, but after a while the intensity of the surges was making me look for relief elsewhere. Our room thankfully had a large walk in shower which became our sanctuary for the next 2 hours. With every surge my husband would hold the shower head at my back whilst I would bear my body down with the support bar. The breaks in between the shower head was aimed at my pelvis, providing some warming comfort.

At this point our midwife had me return to the bed for an examination. Conscious of being reclined on my back, we tried together to time it perfectly, but the surges were thick and fast - locked in position mid exam it was truly one of the most memorable surges of our labour. UFO is no lie!!! We counted patiently through the surge to have me back up on my feet. A reward however, I had dilated from 3cm to 9cm in a small space of time and given the green light to get into the birthing pool. Another milestone reached!

After half an hour or so in the pool, I felt the surges reach another level of intensity, with no breaks in between. They felt like they were taking over and becoming stronger than me. My mind began to loose focus. My breathing became uncontrolled. My head started to shake at my husband, silently telling him I couldn’t do this! All I received back was a continuous nod. His silence giving me the confidence to carry on. 4 seconds in, 8 seconds out... transitioning was over, control was back and that need to push shortly followed.

This was the most empowering part of our labour for me. My husband still reminisces about me changing position in the pool when he and our midwife could see our babies head and enthusiastically saying ‘ok we can do this, let’s meet our baby!’. It was like a new wave of energy had come alive within me and I became even more determined. Down breathing through these surges felt like forever... they kept cheering ‘he’s nearly here, one last push, one last push’ ..but his head still wasn’t out. It took everything I had to hold the last cluster of breaths for, at 9.10pm, a true to their word ‘big baby’ boy, weighing 9lbs, came into our world. The most unexplainable, overwhelming feeling of love hit us both!! The tears!! The cheers!! We did it!!

Now 2 weeks post partum and I am STILL in awe of my body, in admiration of its strength to deliver our baby without intervention or drugs. Thankful for our midwives that cared for us all with the greatest energy. But most of all just more in love with my husband now than ever before. In a time when partners are being denied their right to be part of appointments and, in some cases, parts of birth, I have to voice that I watched my husband over the 9 months selflessly navigate around all the hurdles of being a birth partner. To the point of planning how to be with us in birth but not present in the room if Covid continued to take hold of our hospitals. We together ‘hypnobirthed’ with PBC and all the tools in the tool kit we made together as parents to be. His own positivity, his strength, his determination united with mine to give my body and mind the security it needed. He made me feel safe and my body at ease. Without him I am certain our birth would have been a different story.