Birth story - Gemma and baby Vida

We were very lucky to have a quick conception and uncomplicated pregnancy.

I didn’t suffer too badly from pregnancy symptoms, just some mild nausea and the usual discomforts. Blood work and scans along the way were all good, so I was confident/hopeful for a smooth labour and delivery. We decided to travel to Portugal to remote work for 3 months during the pregnancy, as a bit of a late and extended honeymoon. We also made the bold and permanent move from London to France during the pregnancy. So the pregnancy was a period of massive life changes, but all exciting and positive. My husband and I watched the online PBC course since we were between (not all English speaking) counties, this was most practical for us. We both immediately embraced the approach and worked on practicing the exercises assuming a vaginal delivery was on the cards.

I had one little scare at 34 weeks. When getting out of the bath, some blood dripped out onto the floor. Not a lot but it was fresh red blood so we thought it worth calling to ask. They said that since it was in my 3rd trimester I should go in to the hospital to get it checked out. The midwife did a quick internal exam while monitoring the baby’s heartbeat and my contractions. All was fine, and it seemed that I wasn’t going into labour (thankfully as we weren’t ready or in the right part of the country!). I did at this point realise that I had been having Braxton Hicks A LOT. In the hospital the monitor was detecting them every 5 minutes but I didn’t feel them. All the while I had thought the baby was sticking her bum out as my uterus was contracting more to one side! The midwife told me that I should work less and rest, rest, rest. She thought the fact that we had been driving long distances in the past few days was making me contract more. We had one last long car journey, to get back to our permanent base in the centre of France.

BREECH BABY

We arrived there safely, so I made the transition to the French hospital at 35 weeks, where there was a lot to do in terms of new blood work and meetings with the OB, anaesthetist, sonographer etc. My husband was with me to translate as my French is not good yet.

It was on this first day, amid all of these meetings and confirmed by an ultrasound, that we found out baby was breech. It was a bit of a shock to me as I hadn’t even considered this as a possibility. There was immediate talk of booking an ECV to try to turn the baby. I felt like I was lacking in information (the language barrier didn’t help) although we went ahead and booked in for the following week, and I figured I had a few days to digest and ponder this incase I wanted to change my mind. The doctor explained that if the ECV was unsuccessful, I would still have the option to try for a vaginal birth, if my pelvis was a favourable shape (which would have to be assessed by a scan), and there would have to be 6 personnel present for the delivery; a doctor, anesthesist, midwife, student etc.. At this point I already felt like a vaginal breech delivery would be too daunting. Perhaps if I had already had a successful vaginal birth I might feel more confident to try but since this was my first rodeo I found this prospect too daunting. I was also aware that this breech birth attempt might well end in a C section anyway.

ECV

After a swiftly booked acupuncture session (resulting in no movement), many upside down yoga poses, frozen peas/a hot water bottle, and a few days to research and digest, I decided to go ahead with the ECV to try to turn the baby. So I went in at 36+2 weeks for the procedure. The doctor and midwives were great and adapted to my language situation with grace, but after a VERY uncomfortable 20 minutes of pushing and twisting, my baby was not ready to be moved. Alas, the doctor outlined the pro’s and cons of the Cesarean procedure for me once again and asked if I wanted to book that or attempt the vaginal delivery. I already knew that if the ECV was unsuccessful I would opt for the elective Cesarean so it was booked in for 29th June, 3 weeks from then. This still felt very surreal to me as I never imagined delivering via Cesarean. I was naturally apprehensive about having surgery, having never had anything like this before and being quite squeamish about blood and guts ! Having said that, a part of me was also relieved that I was unlikely to have to confront the pain and unpredictability of natural labour, as well as the inevitable assault on my nether regions . Of course, there was still the small chance the baby could turn on her own so I felt like I had to do 2 sets of homework to prepare.

I had been using Aniball and doing perineal massage, which I continued to do on the off-chance that the baby would flip. In the meantime we wrote down some birth preferences for the Cesarean which Pierre translated into French. We also made a playlist. I had intended to brush up on my French hospital vocabulary but this fell by the wayside somewhat amidst all the baby supply sourcing and practical prep which had been left to the last minute due to our nomad lifestyle during the pregnancy.

CESAREAN

The day of the Cesarean approached, and came! I can’t say I felt fully prepared mentally or practically but I did the best I could, and techniques learned from the PBC course helped a lot. We drove to the hospital with our stuff at 7am, and were greeted by the midwives who began monitoring the baby’s heart rate and my vitals. A final blood test was done to check for risk of clotting (i think). All was well and we would be ready for surgery soon. We were shown to our room. Yes, I would have a private room for the duration of my stay (which in France is 5 days after a Cesarean). God bless the French health care system and generous maternity infrastructure! We were laughing and joking, and sending photos to the family of Pierre in his scrubs. I had a wild mix of emotions- between the excitement of meeting the baby to being scared of a needle going into my back and being cut open. A student midwife came to tell us that our surgery had been delayed due to an emergency taking priority which we knew to expect, so waited patiently. Our time came at approximately 10.30am when they started to prep me for surgery. They put numbing patches on my hand where the canula would go and on my back for the spinal. After 20 minutes or so we were taken to the operating room. I was left alone with the team so they could administer the spinal and do the final prep. This was very daunting as Pierre wasn’t with me for the first time in all my hospital visits, and being nervous my French was not flowing! Nevertheless we got underway. The team tried to speak English for me so I could understand what was happening. I tried to focus on my breathing and squeezed somebody’s hand very hard and tried to focus on my breathing as I arched my back for the spinal to be administered. It was fine from what I can remember! I was laid out on my back with my arms to the sides which I didn’t like. I felt extremely vulnerable! They used ice cubes to double and triple check that I couldn’t feel anything from the chest down.

Everything seemed to move quite quickly from that point. Pierre came back in, at which point I cried just seeing him again. It was all very overwhelming even before baby came out. It seemed like moments, and then the very uncomfortable pushing sensation which made my whole body move from the pressure. I could feel things happening but no pain. Then in what felt like a blur of moments which I can’t attribute an amount of time to but later found out it had been at 11.20am when she entered the world, I heard a cry, Pierre said she was out, we saw her being cleaned up on an adjacent table. I’ll never forget my first glimpse of her there. A perfect little human in my image! Lots of black hair. They brought her over to my chest for skin to skin as we had requested. It was difficult for me to see her properly at the angle my head was at, and my hands were so restricted with wires and tubes so she was held on me by somebody else. I was still so happy to see what I could of her, in all of her and my own disoriented glory. This was the human that had just been lumps, bumps and hiccups to me mere minutes ago.

After a while (not sure how long as my sense of time was very distorted) she was taken away to be dressed and weighed etc, and I was left alone as Pierre went with her. I suddenly felt very nauseous so one of the team brought me a tray to be sick in. It was just watery spit up since I hadn’t been allowed to eat since the previous night. They then did something to tweak my drugs to help with the nausea. We did have our playlist on in theatre but I can’t remember the song that played as she was born or the subsequent songs. It really wasn’t my focus at the time!

After I was all stitched up which didn’t seem to take too long, the surgeon came to speak to me. He told me that everything had gone well, but he had found a fibroid in my uterus - about 3/4cm in size, which probably grew bigger during the pregnancy. He added it to my medical notes, which would be something I wouldn’t think about again for a while.

I was moved into the recovery room, where I was joined by Pierre and the baby. They put her straight onto my nipple to see if she would latch.. and she did! It wasn’t the most enjoyable scenario with all the tubes still attached and my feeling incredibly sleepy from the drugs. But I tried to enjoy the first moments with the baby. I perked up after a couple of hours and things were more relaxed after we were taken back to our room. I was so happy and in awe of the baby!

RECOVERY AND BREASTFEEDING

The next few days were amazing and challenging in equal measure. When people ask me about recovery from the surgery, I usually say that was nothing compared to the challenge of breastfeeding. I had my initial colostrum as the baby seemed to be eating and slept well the first night, but the second night was hellish. No matter how much I ‘fed’ her she wouldn’t settle and neither of us got any sleep. It didn’t help that I was alone as I had sent Pierre home to get some sleep in a proper bed as I though there was no point in us both being sleep deprived! It turned out I didn’t have any milk which is why the baby was so upset and unsettled all night. Her weight had dropped under 10% of her birthweight, so we decided to give her formula through a tiny tube while she breastfed, so she and my body had the sensation of her on the breast. This worked for a bit.. and then it didn’t any more.. so we fed straight from the bottle. It was such a relief when her stomach was full and she was so happy and sleepy. The midwives (sage-femmes) were very supportive and attuned to helping me breastfeed, having established that I was serious about it. To cut a long story short, my milk never ‘came in’ in the traditional sense, but it took a good few weeks of pumping, continuing to put the baby to the breast, and supplementing with formula when that wasn’t enough, until I could exclusively breast feed her. I don’t regret supplementing for that early period. In fact, it was a lifesaver as we were all much happier for it. She also got used to taking a bottle very early on so is happy to be fed from either boob or bottle. And now 3 and a half months in, she is still on 100% breastmilk (sometimes expressed) which I plan to keep up until 6 months. I hope this gives some hope to mums with low supply at the start, that not everyone wakes up a few days after the birth soaked in milk. In my case it took a bit more work but was absolutely possible!

I was very lucky to have an easy recovery from surgery. I made sure to keep active within comfortable limits. I don’t think my recovery affected my ability to care for my baby in any way. It took me a while to look at the scar (thankfully my stomach was still sticking out enough that I couldn’t see it without a mirror!). Now the scar is just a part of me, and I like it!

One other phenomenon worth mentioning which came along with having a breech baby is that she was born with some mild/moderate plagiocephaly of her skull, which is a distortion from being squashed in an asymmetric position in ureto for a while before birth. She favours having her head turned to her left side. She is having physiotherapy to help work her neck muscles and encourage her to turn the other way. She’s doing great, and as the months go by and she spends less time on her back, we are optimistic that her head shape will naturally even out.

I can 100% say that my birth experience was positive and empowering. I have loved being a part of this community for the past several months! Thanks to all the other mums for posting their stories, I have really enjoyed reading them. Best of luck to all the expectant mums, and I hope there was something in my story that will interest or reassure you. Bonne naissance à tous!