Birth story - Emma and baby Naeve

Our first daughter was in the breach position and so we were advised at 38 weeks to have an elective c-section, which we did. It was by no means a bad experience, but I felt sad that I had not had the opportunity to experience 'giving birth' and had missed out on all the special first skin to skin and feeding moments that weren't given as an option. We experienced secondary infertility trying to conceive again, turns out my eldest was a bit of a miracle baby! But through IVF were very lucky to conceive again in December 2019. I knew I wanted to try for a VBAC but was told very early in our pregnancy that because I was carrying an IVF baby and had a previous c-section, chances were slim and we were classed as high risk. My friend introduced us to hypnobirthing and the positive birth company in March, and I can honestly say the information, skills and exercises helped me to survive pregnancy during lock down and supported me to seek the birth I wanted.

Our baby always measured small, but this became a worry when at 36 weeks she had stopped growing. Scans showed my placenta had started to fail and we were offered an induction at 38 weeks. We used BRAIN to help us think about all our options and agreed to go ahead. After reading the positive birthing book and watching the videos on how to have a positive experience of induction I felt relaxed going forward. I had always been terrified of the idea of an induction, having heard many stories of where they had led to long, difficult and at times traumatic births for friends of mine.

At 38+4 weeks I was admitted to the antenatal ward to have a balloon catheter fitted to begin the induction. Having previously had a c-section, the use of hormones to induce can incur risks of scar rupturing, so the balloon is used to try and open your cervix. The consultant was able to insert the balloon easily and said my cervix was very thin, which I was so pleased to hear and hoped this would mean they could break my waters after the 24 hour period they leave the balloon in for. The antenatal ward was hard, it felt impossible to set up my bay to create the environment I wanted, it was hot, loud and I was on the ward with 3 other women. My husband could not stay with me whilst I was on the ward, which was really tough, but he helped me to think through what I would need with me to create some sense of peace and relaxation whilst there. I used headphones to listen to the positive affirmations and play lists and covered myself in my scented body mist! I was monitored at regular intervals, but the midwifes helped me to have these fitted in a way so I could maintain my UFO positions on the birth ball or standing. I had some cramping during the afternoon and night and the following morning after having the balloon inserted for 20 hours it fell out on its own and an exam showed I was 4cms and could be moved to the labour ward to have my waters broken!

My husband was able to join me once I was in my own room and he immediately set about getting the room ready. I know he found having this role so helpful and he was an amazing keeper of the cave!

Our midwife was wonderful and after reading our birth preferences did everything she could to support us, including getting us wireless monitors, as the consultant wanted me to be continuously monitored. My waters were broken at 12pm and very soon after I was having surges that quickly grew in intensity. The ensuite was the darkest part of our room, so we used this for a base and I stood up in the shower with the cold water on my back surrounded by our tealights. I used up breathing through all of my surges and listened to the positive affirmations throughout. I felt so calm and in control and believed that my body could and was birthing my baby in the way I had hoped. I was then examined at 4pm and was 6-7cms. By 5.30pm, I felt something change in my body and I could no longer up breathe through my surges. I felt panicky at this point and lost confidence in myself, but my husband was amazing, he was right by my side the whole time and reminded me of how much I had already achieved and how proud he was of me. He asked our midwife to examine me again at 5.45pm and none of us could quite believe that I was 10cms and the midwife could feel the head! I no longer felt comfortable standing or leaning in the shower so moved to kneeling on the edge of the bed and leaning into my husband. The down breathing technique helped me to focus on allowing my body to naturally move my baby down. This stage felt very quick and intense for me and I had very little time between surges, but the knowledge that my body was perfectly designed to do exactly what it was doing helped me keep calm and trust in my body and my instincts. Our daughter Neave Alice was born at 6.26pm and weighed 5lbs15. We had delayed cord clamping and enjoyed lots of skin to skin cuddles for over an hour. I felt, and still feel like an absolute superhero!

The positive birth company has completely changed my view on the birth I thought I could have, and because of what I learnt, and the skills I used, I had the most wonderful experience birthing my baby girl. I cannot thank you all enough!