Birth story - Elli and baby Hani

I have to start by saying I know how fortunate I was to have the birth I did. I had studied and practiced the PBC hypnobirthing digital pack from 20 weeks, read about 4 different books and watched countless videos. I also exercised right up until the day of birth, which isn’t for everyone or possible for all, but I truly believe it helped me greatly.

Prior to giving birth I was worried I wouldn’t be able to get myself into a truly positive state because I’m not very good at meditating. The day of my labour I had felt really out of body in hindsight, very tired and no guilt sitting on the sofa a lot of the day. My boyfriend came home that evening and as he describes it now - I was very Zen. We had been listening to our labour playlist all week and had it on that night. I lay on the sofa just rubbing my tummy with my eyes closed. My boyfriend had a feeling and spontaneously took a photo - I guess knowing it could be the last before baby arrives.

I went to bed early and woke around 1:30 with period pains. But I’d had them weeks prior so just assumed that it was just general pains and maybe his head properly engaging. I tried to go back to sleep and couldn’t so I got up and walked around my lounge. Before I knew it a couple of hours passed and I was in a really relaxed state - still in disbelief I was possibly contracting and in labour. So I carried on - I felt so calm. So at peace. I decided to just let my boyfriend know I was possibly in labour and he too was calm. I got in the bath instinctively.

I decided to start timing using the Freya app at about 4am. My contractions were 4-5 mins apart. I called the hospital and they told me to give it an hour. So I did. I then checked back on Freya and I was 2-3 mins apart. So I called my mum who was going to be taking us to hospital and also a birth partner as well as my boyfriend. By the time they arrived it was 7am, I was eyes closed, in my own world. I wasn’t scared, I wasn’t worried, I wasn’t nervous, I was nothing but calm and concentrating on my breathing. I didn’t feel pain.

From my flat to the car I had 3 contractions. My mum was a bit worried I was going to give birth in the car and looking back - I was very close. I couldn’t sit down in the car I just remember semi standing and my boyfriend being so calm and rubbing my back. I had a sudden urge to push and we were thankfully a road away.

We walked up the stairs to the maternity delivery suite - as I walked into the reception I bent over a chair and felt an enormous urge to push. Out came my waters and plug in a very dramatic fashion and all over mine and my boyfriends shoes. They whisked me into the birth centre - skipping the assessment room. The midwife knew I was close. She asked me to lie down so she could examine me but I just couldn’t. Eventually I semi lay back - she just about began to examine and said ‘yep you’re 10cm you can start pushing’.

They filled the pool, I stripped mostly naked and got in. I felt so ready, my body knew what to do. But most amazingly my mind knew exactly how to help me. There was a moment where I felt a bit shakey - my mum and boyfriend were loading me with lucozade sport and cold flannels - a sudden thought crossed my mind ‘oh, this is quite an enormous feeling - I’m quite shakey, can I do this’ as quickly as the thought came it went and was replaced with an out loud ‘ I can do this. I have everything I need to birth my baby - I am strong and powerful’.

Two hours after arriving - my beautiful perfect baby boy Hani was born. I still feel so incredibly proud that I did it, exactly as I’d dreamt of and completely unmedicated. It was all me. Thank you PBC for guiding me and thank you body for being so strong!