Birth story - Danielle and baby Finn

I would highly recommend hypnobirthing to every pregnant lady who may be thinking about it. Along with the Freya App- it’s is such a calming tool to use during your labour too. I honestly don’t I would have stayed as calm without hypnobirthing. 

We recently welcomed baby number two into the world in a rather unforgettable way- our beautiful baby boy was born in our car! In a lay-by on the motorway.

Things ended up escalating quickly and he came so fast, we didn’t make it to the hospital in time.  He was a roadside delivery.

We ended up delivering him ourselves with no midwives or medical support. Although it was a scary time and a scenario that no one ever wants to face (and one I thought only ever happened on films), I truly believe that had I not been as calm as I was & trusted my body, maybe I would not have been able to have birthed our son myself as easily and as safely into this world.

On Sunday 9th February, on a very stormy day (just to add to the whole drama here) I began having period pains at around mid-day, just like how the early stages of labour began with my first child. But also, I had period pain sensation a few days prior but nothing happened. So, knowing that this early stage could possibly go on for quite some time, and with a very energetic two year old daughter to entertain, we decided to brave the rain and go about our day until things started to progress further. So, we took our little girl out to a local role play centre as planned. We played, we ate cake and the period pain sensation continued. Had I have known what was to come, I would have just stayed at home and chilled!

Once home, later that afternoon, I decided to have some rest to reserve my energy. I had a cosy nap with my little girl. Feeling somewhat emotional and also excited knowing that soon we’d be a family of four. I snuggled up to her to cherish possibly our last cuddles with it being ‘just us’, and we had a nice arvo snooze. 

Around 6pm, things had progressed a little, I was having proper contractions. However, each one was still fairly far apart and they wern’t following any pattern and the pain was pretty manageable. I felt good, prepared and excited. I took some more paracetamol and we patiently waited for it to ‘ramp up’.  Unbeknown to me, I was a lot further along and further dilated than I actually realised.

We had planned for my in-laws to look after our daughter when we went into hospital, and so, my husband gave them the heads up that I was in labour and to keep their phones near them in the night, just in case it was time to go in during the night. We had a delicious dinner and I decided to have a soak in the bath. In the bath, things started to feel like they were positively progressing. I used the Freya App to help with counting my surges. They were becoming more regular. I felt relaxed, using the App with the calming music and candles lit in the bath. Freya was great at helping me to stay relaxed and breathe using the simple techniques. 

I got out of the bath and dressed into some comfy clothes for the hospital & I told my husband things had progressed, we should prepare for leaving for the hospital but everything still felt fairly manageable. I didn’t think it was necessary to make our way to the hospital, just yet. As it was second time round, there was also the juggling child care element, timing it right with the grandparents coming over, etc. We made sure our bags were together ready to go, I quietly popped into our little girl’s room to give her a final kiss before we became a four. We then went downstairs to put on my tens machine as I felt like I needed more than paracetamol and we moved to our living room. We lit some candles and I managed a few more of my contractions on my birthing ball with the help from the Freya App, keeping me calm and breathing through every surge. My husband kept an eye on the app the whole way through to see how frequently my surges were coming and how long they were lasting. Pretty soon, Freya let us know that my labour was now established. My contractions were close together, but they then started becoming closer and closer with no or little break between. At this point it was around midnight. My husband called triage to let them know we were coming in now & that I hoped for a water birth (I had a water birth with our first baby and I loved the experience), he also phoned his parents to ask them to come over ASAP (they only live a 5 minuet drive away). Everything was still pretty calm at this point, I felt like I was managing everything ok. I felt in control & I presumed I still had at least a few more hours of this to go...

My husband loaded the car with our hospital bags and I remained in the kitchen, holding onto the kitchen worktop and breathing through a few rather big and close together surges. They had become intense, pretty fast! Then, my waters broke. I remember looking at my phone to check the time in case the midwives asked, it was 00.33. In laws had arrived. We got in the car immediately and set off on our short journey down the A1 to the hospital  (10 min car journey to the hospital). However, my waters breaking is what made things change quickly and this baby was now ready to come, right there and then, thick and fast. I suddenly felt like a needed a big poo. I even apologised to my husband as I said “I’m sorry, I’m pooing my pants”. But I soon realised it wasn’t a massive poo, it was a baby! I needed to push. I shouted to my husband that I needed to push & to put his foot down! I think he thought I was perhaps exaggerating (I mean, no one ever thinks they will actually have a baby in the car), so he reassured me I was ok and we’d be there in less than 10 minuets. He was also trying to concentrate on driving down the A1 motorway as it was very stormy with side rain!

I knew there wasn’t time. I needed to bear down. I took off my seatbelt, turned around on the passenger seat so that I could kneel  in a squatting position and hold on to the head rest. I had trainers and leggings on. I managed to get one trainer off and one leg out of my leggings and pants, just in time so that I could widen my legs before a big contraction came and I felt the head coming out. I was crowning! I put my hand down there to feel my baby’s head. Crap. This was happening. My husband reminded me that I shouted “I can do this”.  I must have had a transition moment where I suddenly went into ‘survival mode’, which just took over me. I knew I had to trust that I could do it, stay focused and I needed to stay as calm as I possibly could in that situation!

I slowed down and used controlled downward breathing until the head was fully out. 

My husband must’ve felt so terrified, driving in the dark down the motorway, he couldn’t see what was going on, he could only hear. He asked me what was happening, I told him he needed to pull over because we wouldn’t make the hospital in time, the head was out and he needed to help me deliver our baby. After ALOT of swear words from him 😆 he pulled over, but before he had chance to properly stop the car and run round to the passenger side to see to my attention, one more contraction came, so I went with it and I felt his shoulders and then body come. In  just two contractions and approx seven minuets after my waters broke at home, our son, Finn had entered the world at approx 00.40 in a dramatic & somewhat memorable fashion.

I tried to reach down to grab him as he came out, although it was the middle of the night and during a storm, so I couldn’t see a thing. It was pitch black. Finn came out onto the seat but he then rolled down into the footwell of the car (I mean, you couldn’t write this!) My very worried but wonderful husband ran round to the passenger side, opened the door, there was our baby in the footwell. He picked our baby boy up, wrapped him in his coat and we checked to make sure the cord wasn’t around his neck, etc. Our baby let out a tiny cry. It was the most beautiful and reassuring sound i’ve ever heard, as we knew he was breathing. Although, understandably, we were still worried that he needed medical attention & because at that point the midwives would usually be there checking your precious baby over. Obviously, the cord was still attached and I was in a pretty awkward position- still on my knees facing the head rest . My husband guided me so that I could turn and manoeuvre myself safely without restricting any blood flow to the cord, etc. I sat back down on the passenger seat, my husband placed our baby boy on my lap all wrapped up in his coat. With just the car spot light shining down on him. I could see him, he was perfect. I could see his cute squishy face, chubby hands and masses of thick, dark hair. He was just perfection. He seemed so calm and relaxed considering his entrance, just looking up at me. 

We were just minuets away from hospital when Finn decided to arrive. My husband quickly called his parents to say baby had been born and for them to phone the hospital to be ready for us as we needed help - not sure why we didn’t phone the hospital ourselves, I can only imagine that my husband didn’t have the triage number to hand. Parents was just instinct. My husband carried on driving. When we pulled up in the hospital carpark, the midwives came out with a wheelchair to assist. We both felt shocked. I was shaking  and very, very teary. A sense of ‘did that just happen’ and huge relief that we were now at the hospital with midwives. We were safe. They were so amazing, calm, kind and reassuring. They helped me out of the car and into the wheelchair and made our way into a delivery room. 

They cut the cord, checked our little Finn over and I delivered the placenta on the bed. 

Finn weighed 7lb12oz - a very healthy baby boy. I managed to get away with just a few grazes down below but nothing bad, I felt amazed I managed to stay so intact with no help from midwives telling me when and when not to push, etc. (Plus I gave birth with one leg in my legging, one shoe on and my coat on!) I know first time babies often pave the way and you are less like to tear as bad with second births, but I also think the breathing techniques helped me to stay as relaxed as possible (thanks to the Positive Birth Company) to allow my body do most of the work. 

The paediatricians came over to do the standard newborn checks- hips and eyes etc. Everything was ok with Finn. We were told we could go home. We were in and out on the same day. Back home, we introduced Finn to his wonderful big sister, Mia. I was left feeling a somewhat shocked & amazed. I won’t lie, I felt pretty emotional for about a week after, replaying the event over in my head, I found it tough. Thinking ‘what if he wasn’t ok’....’What if there were complications’....’Did we leave it too long’. But also, I felt proud of myself and amazed by the birth. I had a feeling of empowerment - I unexpectedly birthed my own baby without any midwives around. I’m not saying that’s how I’d choose to give birth again, but it did confirm that my body (and all our bodies) really are amazing and if just trust them to do what they need to do in labour, then we will be ok, even if your labour and the birth doesn’t go how you had originally hoped or planned. That’s labour, we don’t know how it will go or when labour will start. All we can control is our emotions as best as we can and how we handle the situation should things go in a different direction. 

Now the dust has settled,  I think to myself what a story and what an entrance. I believe Finn was always meant to be born that way, in a dramatic fashion. I also feel like it’s made me a stronger person in someways and I feel so grateful. So grateful that he was safe. It’ll be fun to see if this says something about his character in the future, maybe he’s destined to be a rock star, or maybe just impatient ! 😆⭐️