Birth story - Bryanne and baby Benjamin

*Trigger Warning* - Unassisted home birth, being alone, contractions, precipitous delivery

The day before Benjamin's birthday (Dec. 1st), I was running a bunch of errands around town with my 2 year old. I had weeks of braxton hicks contractions at that point but that day they were different. Usually braxton hicks would only come on when I was doing physical tasks but they would come on while I was resting (driving, eating, etc). I intuitively felt as if the next day was going to be "baby day" and messaged a few of my friends to manifest 12/2/22 as the baby's birthday! When my husband got home from work that evening (after working overtime for the first time in months and I ended up eating roast dinner all alone lol) I mentioned that I felt the baby was coming any day and he rolled his eyes at me as I was only 37+2 weeks! I didn't blame him as our first arrived at 39+5 weeks. We went to bed at a regular time that night without any further signs besides braxton hicks that the baby was coming.

Around 2am I woke up from contractions intense enough to keep me awake. I allowed a few to come and go and at 230am I drew myself a bath to see if the bath would slow down or halt the contractions. The bath didn't affect the contractions at all and around 3am I opened my Freya App to track my contractions and assist with my up breathing. Contractions were coming every 5 minutes and were 1 minute long. 330am I hear my toddler running around our bedroom and I tell my husband to pull him into our bed and get him back to sleep ASAP. My husband hears the hypnobirthing tracks and knows it's "go time" without me having to say anything. 4am my contractions are intensifying and coming every 3-5 minutes and lasting 60-90 seconds. I call my sister to come be with my toddler and I call my midwife to inform her of my progress. I get out of the bath and let my husband know we will be headed to the birth centre as soon as my sister arrives. At this point my husband put the TENS machine on me.

I knew I wanted to go to the birth centre instead of staying home for assessment because my 2 year old was running around and wanting to play in the wee hours of the morning. He knew something was happening and it was distracting my focus. My sister arrived at 445am and we apologized for our rambunctious/hilarious early morning toddler as we left out the door. The 15 minute drive to the birth centre was uneventful and I could tell that the drive altered the frequency/length/consistency of my contractions.

We arrived at the birth centre at 5am at the same time as our midwife. Once inside, we drew a bath and did our best to relax as the midwife assessed my labor from afar. At that point, my contractions changed and were anywhere from 3 to 12 minutes apart and lasting from 15 to 90 seconds. After a few hours I consented to a cervical assessment and I was 2 cm and my cervix was described as "not an active labor cervix". This didn't discourage me as with my 1st I went from 3cm to a baby being born in 45 minutes. The only difference with this labor was that I wasn't thinned out and she couldn't feel the baby's head during the cervical assessment. Baby was sitting up high. During my time at the birth centre, my husband and I were joking, snacking, watching movies, and I kept repeating "are we sure this is real labor?!". My contractions weren't painful but more of a pressure/discomfort.

Around 830am our midwife started discussing my options and letting us choose what our day would look like. She told us that she had kept us there for 2 hours longer than she normally would have due to my previous labor history but she felt as if I wouldn't be having the baby until later that day as I wasn't progressing very quickly and the baby was "up high". She recommended we go home and I take some tylenol/gravol, have a nap, and see a chiropractor later that morning to help get the baby into position (we booked an 11am chiro appointment). We agreed that there was no use of me staying at the birth centre and that we would come back later. I easily agreed to go home as I knew I would be more comfortable there.

At 9am we left the birth centre and drove the 15 minute ride home. During that drive I texted the friends I asked to manifest the day before that it was "baby day" and I texted a few other friends and my aunt to cancel plans I had made for that day. As we passed the hospital on the way home, I let my husband know that I was exhausted from being up since 2am having contractions and that I wasn't above going to the hospital to have an epidural. If I was already this tired... imagine how I'd be later that day when it was time to push the baby out! I was feeling defeated and in need of escape from my discomfort. My husband was encouraging of whatever I wanted and we agreed to go home to get the rest I needed. The reassurance from my husband that I was doing good was what I needed. Looking back, I should have known my "I can't do this" attitude was a sign of transition.

We pulled up in the garage at 915am. I waited for a contraction to come and go before I left the vehicle. I had another contraction at the bottom of the stairs up to my bedroom. Another contraction grabbing tylenol. Another contraction grabbing gravol. Another contraction grabbing my water bottle and filling it up. Another contraction grabbing a blanket and setting up my pregnancy pillow for my nap in bed. These contractions were intense and I was up on my tiptoes and up breathing/moaning through each one. I convinced myself that I was "spiraling out of control" and I just needed to relax and have the nap my midwife prescribed. I laid in bed and opened up the Freya App to help get myself "under control" and had another contraction at 930am. This contraction was back to the calmness I had since 2am. I was relieved and had a "You've got this, Bryanne!" moment.

I closed my eyes and was more than ready for my nap. Then boom, 30 seconds later (932am) I had a contraction so intense that I got up on my hands and knees. I knew within a second that the baby was coming and it was coming NOW. I called my midwife during that contraction and stated firmly, "The baby is coming!". She responded, "YOU ARE JOKING!". And as she said that my water broke and I informed her. She told me she'd be right there. I hung up on her without explaining that I was completely alone in my bedroom and I quickly called my husband and he didn't answer. I called my sister (who was in our basement with our toddler) and she answered after half a ring. I yelled "Come upstairs!" as another contraction began at 934 am. Benjamin's head was coming out as I heard my sister run up the stairs. I knew she didn't want to see this moment and I yelled, "Grab Grant!" (My husband) and she yelled back, "Where is he?!" to which I responded, "I don't know!". She quickly located him outside shoveling snow and yelled at him to hurry and come inside. Grant tripped over himself removing his laced up boots and barely touched a stair coming up the stairs. He didn't know what he would be walking in to.

I was kneeling next to our bed with one hand down my pants (yes, my pants were still FULLY on) and I was holding the baby's head. I made sure to memorize my husband's shocked face as I said, "The heads out". He lunged towards me frantically stripping off his jacket and saying, "What do I do?!". I simply said, "Nothing" as I birthed the rest of our baby at 936 am and lifting him out of my pants and quickly ensuring the cord wasn't around his neck. I immediately called my midwife back and after she answered I said, "The baby is here" and she asked, "Is the baby crying?" and in that moment the baby started crying which was music to all of our ears. Our midwife informed us to just relax and lay in bed. She said there was nothing for us to do and to just wait for her. My husband went and grabbed a shower curtain and towels to lay out on our bed and helped me get my pants off and lay down. We laid there laughing and admiring our new addition (excitedly finding out it was another boy!). Our midwife stayed on the phone with us until just about before she arrived. We blissfully soaked in those moments before her arrival. She got to our bedroom just before the delivery of the placenta and let me cut the cord! The midwife stayed for a few hours and tucked us into bed to enjoy life as a family of 4.

The birth of my son Benjamin was exactly what it needed to be. Beautiful, wonderful, blissful. I am still in awe/shock/amazement of what my body can do and how I can birth an entire baby without even pushing.