Birth story - Beth and baby girl

I wanted to write my story to illustrate how and why hypnobirthing works. I would not have got the birth I wanted without it. Long one. Lots of poo.

PREPARATION

Physically my pregnancy was on the whole straightforward. I suffer with anxiety and struggle when I am not in control, where what is going to happen is not certain or things don’t go to plan and/or schedule. In essence – pregnancy and parenthood!

My husband and I did the online course together. First tip – if possible, your birthing partner should understand the principles and techniques. I told my husband as it was online he would be able to enjoy a beer whilst learning.... Bribery aside he was soon on board with the concept.

We were both surprised to learn that hypnobirthing is not about making your birth ‘nicer’ but about empowering you and teaching the science behind the principles made complete sense to us.

THE BIRTH

I was unsure about having a sweep and declined one until my ‘due date’ had passed. However, I was keen to avoid induction at all costs and a sweep felt like the lesser of two evils so had one on the Monday (40+6). It really wasn’t that bad actually!

​I did then have some bleeding which we got checked out at the hospital on the Tuesday (41 weeks). It was here I was told I was 2-3cm dilated – woop! We were on our way!

At about 11.30pm on Wednesday (41+1) I started getting back pains coming and going.

By 3am (41+2) I knew these were contractions so I woke my husband. We had something to eat and I danced/swayed through the contractions to Dean Martin and used positions I learned in Yoga to get through the contractions.

By 7am my Freya app told me that the pattern suggested I was in established labour – another woop! We rang the MLU who suggested we waited until the contractions were 3 minutes apart and lasting a minute. Instead they then slowed down to every 6 minutes. By mid afternoon, having not slept the night before and having attempted to be mobile all day, I was exhausted. The contractions slowed down further so I took a nap.

The contractions started coming back in the evening, but it was when my waters broke at 11pm that they really ramped up in frequency and intensity. I did struggle at this point. Every contraction sent waters gushing and the pain in my back was significant. I started vomiting too. The hospital advised us to come in to check waters and to see whether I was ready to be admitted to the MLU. So off we went to the hospital.

Being alone in the triage room (Covid rules) was tough but not as tough as being told that I was....2cm. I felt like the battle I had gone through had gotten me nowhere. They gave me two options. Go home, or hang round the ward and be re-examined in four hours time.

It was at this point that I really lost it. I started being sick again and could not stop myself from shaking. I was so tired. I was quite prepared to ask for a C-section to get it to stop. I was in such a bad place.

I was going to stay but something told me to go home to the environment that I could control. In the car on the way home, it was dimly lit, and I was quiet and just listened to the relaxation tracks on Freya app. It was here that I realised that if I said to myself ‘calm down, stop shaking’ I stopped shaking! It was that simple. Same with the vomiting. I took two paracetamol which I didn’t want to sick up, so I just breathed and told myself ‘don’t panic’.

When I got in I didn’t talk, or turn the lights on. I got straight in the bath. Dan sat on the toilet, in the dark, timing with the app and silent except to remind me to breathe where he thought I was holding my breath. All I did was listen to the app, breath and focus on relaxing my body as much as I could (tip – check your jaw! I found if you can relax that, a lot of your body will follow). It really was magic. It was still tough but all of a sudden it changed. I was in control. I was determined, I knew I could do it. I wasn’t going to give up. Breathe. Relax. Don’t think about anything else. Everything else will follow.

It was at this point my contractions suddenly changed. Firstly, I realised that I wasn’t feeling pain in my back anymore. Secondly I couldn’t help but poo. Warning, from here on, I poo a lot. Everywhere, on everyone.

Anyway, I obviously had to get out of the bath and I continued contracting (and pooing) on all fours on our bed. It occurred to me I was ‘mooing’ and realised that I was in the down stage! As a result, we ended up needing to call an ambulance and we were blue lighted back to hospital arriving just after 7am. A quick exam told me I was 9cm! Unfortunately, they also told us that baby’s heart rate was high and therefore I would need monitoring and couldn’t go to the MLU.

We were wheeled into a birthing room and I had to get onto my back so they could attach the monitor to baby’s head. Things are a bit blurry for me from this point! The midwife suddenly said I needed to push. I asked why and she said because she could see baby’s head!!

From here it was sheer focus on the task at hand. Stay calm, push when I needed to. It was difficult because of everything going on, they were now worried about my heart rate and were trying to put a cannula in my hand/s. Someone was talking a student through how to hold a perineum and storm Arwen was battering hail against the windows. I just focused all my attention on where I could feel her coming and visualised her moving down. Dan telling me he could see loads of hair spurred me on!

Pushing through the ring of fire was not pleasant but I knew it meant we were nearly there. It didn’t last long and I just focused on what I had to do.​

A couple more pushes, and our beautiful baby girl was placed on my chest at 8.11am – an hour after being wheeled into the hospital.

The feeling of pride was overwhelming. I couldn’t believe I had done it. Stood in that triage room hours before was an awful moment. But I had got from there to holding my little girl in six short hours purely because I changed my mindset and focus.

The course was massively helpful to both me and my husband in the birth of our little girl. Without that knowledge I know that my birth would have been a completely different experience and would have likely ended up with interventions.

One final tip, give yourself some time to contemplate your birth. It’s a powerful experience and takes you a while to get your head around what you have been through. Focus on the positive elements – a positive birth does not necessarily mean one without challenges – be proud of what you have achieved, however your story plays out.

Wishing you all the best for your birth and parenthood journeys.