Birth story - Beth and baby Foxx

*Trigger warning* - Contractions (not a negative to me), suspected ectopic pregnancy and blood loss (normal amount)

Pregnancy

We found out around 6 weeks that I was pregnant which was a bit of a shock to us as it wasn't something we had planned (we had taken over as Landlord and Lady of a pub in June 2021). I also had never had plans to have children so the idea of labour terrified me and I was adamant that I would have an elective C-Section. At 8 1/2 weeks, we were in hospital with a suspected Ectopic pregnancy which luckily turned out we were fine. After this, we had pretty smooth sailing with a couple of visits to the hospital with reduced movements (she had just moved herself around to a position I couldn't feel as much)

At 36 weeks we were told baby had gone into a transverse position and that if she was not back engaged at 38 weeks then we would have to book a C-Section, I spent the next two weeks on my birth ball trying to get baby back into position as I really didn't want this mainly due to the recovery period and us having our own business- how my feelings had changed since the beginning of pregnancy!

Labour

For weeks leading up to our due date, I had been experiencing Braxton Hicks and every time I felt them slightly stronger, I would wonder, ‘is this it?!’ My mum and partner said you will know when they are real don't worry. At 40+4, I was busy cleaning up the flat after a weekend of visitors and my partner working in the pub when around 1pm my first contraction came and yes they were right...I knew the difference. For the next couple of hours I carried on doing what I was doing as I thought it would be ages until I was at the stage I could call the birth centre.

At 4.45 I hobbled downstairs to tell my partner he needed to close the pub and that I was calling the birth centre. Whilst I was on the phone, my partner ran a bath, grabbed some paracetamol, made me a cuppa and put the hospital bags in the car all while the regulars finished up their drinks. I was advised to stay at home until the contractions were all lasting at least a minute (they were currently varying still from 45 seconds to a minute) or until the pain became too much.

Just after 7.30, we were in the car and on the way arriving around 7.40 with me in my partners clothes as nothing I wanted to wear of my own was clean (despite her being overdue, there were bits like this I'd not thought about).

The midwife got us into our room and left us to it for around 20 minutes whilst getting all the paperwork she needed as well as oils for their diffuser. During this time I laboured on the birth ball and focused on my breathing, when the midwife returned she also tried a rebozo along with massage techniques- they are very pro hypnobirthing. Again, she then left us to it and we continued as were we with the addition of Fleetwood Mac through the speaker. After a while, the pain was becoming too much for me so my partner went and asked if I could have some pain relief, the midwife wanted me to hold off and suggested that it was time to get in the pool, whilst she was running it I went to the bathroom to be sick and upon standing back up and in the middle of a contraction my waters broke all over my partners joggers

There was a massive relief when getting into the pool as I felt my body relax a bit and it helped me get back to focusing on my breathing...although not for long. Looking back it was the transition but at the time and in pain, I lost myself a little bit and was completely unable to focus on any breathing and not in the best position. At this point I was finally given some pain relief albeit only codeine and paracetamol which I threw up minutes later so didn't have any effect, once the midwife realised that I had transitioned, she finally got out the gas and air- I'm still not sure if this actually helped with the pain but I was definitely more relaxed inbetween surges.

After what felt like forever (which looking back it couldn't have been), I kept saying I couldn't do it anymore, which my partner reminded me I could do it and it wouldn't be too long until we would meet our little girl- my response was the most childish response of "Well I don't want to do it". It was at this point I asked if I could have an internal, the first so far as I just wanted it over, I was fully dilated and the midwife wanted me to carry on doing my thing. I think the realisation that we were getting there and how quick things had already happened was all the motivation I needed to snap back into it, I got myself into a UFO position, got back to my breathing and at 10.40pm, our little girl was born- three hours after arriving at hospital.

We then had over an hour skin on skin whilst having the injection to birth the placenta, I had planned to do this without active management but changed my mind as we just wanted some time as a family with no one in the room, I had one small graze and a small internal tear with no need for any stitches.

One thing that no one warned me about was the blood loss, obviously I knew there would be some but I didn't realise quite how much so it did panic me to start along with just how painful it is to pee

Although I lost my head for a while and didn't think I could do it without some form of stronger pain relief, I'm glad that I trusted my body and had an amazing birth partner who reminded me that I could do it aswell. I feel very blessed that our birth went to plan and am truly fascinated by what our bodies are capable of.