Birth story - Becky and baby Isaac

*Trigger Warning* - Mention of GBS+, cord around baby’s neck

Before our first child, I had always been terrified of giving birth. For our daughter’s birth we took a 12 week Bradley method birth class which completely changed my perspective. We ended up having a medication free birth in the hospital, my waters broke at 38 + 4 and she was born 6 hours later. I had a second degree tear that was one of the most uncomfortable parts of the birth and recovery!

This time, with Covid rampant in our area and with the knowledge and experience from our daughter’s birth, it made the most sense to try for a home birth. I was really hoping for a water birth as well. We hired a wonderful midwife and I switched from the visits with my OB at the medical center to home visits with our midwife. Our 5 y/o daughter was able to be at each visit and see how the midwife measured me and felt for the baby’s position and did the Doppler. I did lots of education with our daughter about home births and what she would be likely to see and hear. She was very curious about everything and not scared at all.

This pregnancy was fairly smooth in spite of my high anxiety about being pregnant during Covid. Our daughter was conceived through IVF and this was a welcome surprise pregnancy- while looking into doing a frozen embryo transfer we got pregnant naturally! I had similar fatigue and food aversions in the first trimester that I did with our daughter. Second trimester was great and third trimester got difficult in the last 3 weeks when I developed carpal tunnel causing numbness in my fingers and also had swollen feet/ankles. I also tested positive for GBS (I was positive with our daughter as well) which was disappointing, but our midwife assured me she had antibiotics she could administer if necessary.

When our doula asked if I had heard about hypnobirthing, I was intrigued. I read Marie Mongan’s hypnobirthing book and then looked into online courses to add to my understanding. I decided on the Positive Birth Company and the videos really helped put it all together. I loved the clear explanations of how the body works during labor, and the breathing techniques and visualizations, and practiced these in my last few weeks. Our daughter helped me make signs for the bedroom with positive/inspiring words and I decorated with twinkle lights to help create my ideal birth environment.

I was able to run and continue resistance work/weights throughout my pregnancy, although my runs turned into slow jogs toward the end of third trimester. I focused on protein and iron in third trimester (due to being a little low on iron at my third trimester blood test) and started eating about 60g of dates per day around 34 weeks. I also incorporated a spinning babies stretching routine into my last trimester. I tried perineal massage a handful of times.

As we approached 40 weeks, I was waiting for signs of labor but nothing was happening, although it felt like I was losing little pieces of my mucous plug every day for about a week. I started wondering if this baby was going to be a latecomer! But I tried to not overthink it and to remind myself that he would come when he was ready.

On 3/21, I went for a brisk walk in the park while my husband and our daughter rode their bikes. It was a beautiful evening and lots of kids and families were out and I could feel the oxytocin flowing. That night I felt different, heavier down low, almost like my period was coming. I wrote in my baby’s and our daughter’s journal that I thought he would be arriving soon, maybe even that night.

I laid down to sleep around 12:30am and could not get comfortable. I kept tossing and turning and realized I felt crampy. I had a little adrenaline rush realizing labor would probably be starting soon! I finally checked the clock and it was 2:30am. I went to the bathroom and when I wiped I saw pink on the toilet paper. Then I really got excited! I woke my husband, who thankfully stayed calm, and we got everything ready. I snacked on banana and peanut butter and got my water and homemade electrolyte drink ready, turned on the twinkle lights and hubby inflated the pool.

I called our midwife and she was happy to hear things were happening but reminded me that it was still early, to try to get some rest and let her know once things progressed. I got in bed with hubby and we both tried to rest, and around 4am I realized I was starting to have mild surges. I started up breathing through each one and this helped me immensely to stay calm and relaxed during and between surges. Each time I breathed in I would think “welcome the wave” and pictured a big beautiful ocean wave as part of my body rising up. When I breathed out I would think “ride the wave” and picture myself surfing on top. (I’m not actually a surfer but I loved imagining I was). I was so relaxed I was able to doze between surges and I didn’t need any music or the Freya app yet. After maybe an hour I got up and made some toast with peanut butter and jam, knowing it would be good to have those energy stores later. The surges continued while I was making toast and moving around the house, I would stop and breathe and focus through each one, and they continued to be manageable. I got back into bed again and curled up on my side with my maternity pillow between my legs, and continued staying in the green zone. I put on my relaxation music and started timing the surges with the Freya app, which were gradually becoming longer and closer together.

This went on for a few hours until our daughter woke up around 9am and my hubby told her the baby was likely coming today! She came into our bed and I was able to hold her hand through a few surges which felt sweet and connecting. Then my husband went to help her get ready and I continued my up breathing on my own. By this time the Freya app said I was in active labor. When hubby came back he said our midwife called and wanted to know if I felt like things were going to the “next level” yet. At that moment I had a surge that felt like it jumped from my lower abdomen to the middle and I told hubby I was not at the next level yet but heading in that direction! He then told me our midwife and doula were on their way.

I felt like I needed to change positions then so I asked him to put the birth ball up on the bed and I knelt on the bed leaning over the ball. This along with counter pressure from hubby on my lower back helped with the intensity of the surges increasing. I continued up breathing and imagining the waves, although it was getting harder to relax during the surges. I also had a moment of panic when hubby had to leave my side for a moment to start filling the pool. Once our nanny arrived at 10:30am to help with our daughter, things really started ramping up. I asked hubby not to leave me until our doula arrived because I was starting to become vocal during the surges and relying on the counter pressure and his presence to get though each one. I was still trying to take deep breaths to send oxygen to my muscles but each surge was becoming quite intense.

Finally our doula arrived and took over the counter pressure while hubby checked on the pool. I was deep in labor land at this point and the surges had become very powerful. I started feeling pressure down low and my doula told me this would be a good time to get in the pool, which I gladly did! The water wasn’t as warm as it could have been but I didn’t mind. I asked for the counter pressure from our doula and hubby to continue while I was in the pool, which continued to help as I felt like each surge was completely taking over my body. Our doula encouraged me to take a deep breath and start bearing down during each surge, and my vocalizations turned into grunting sounds which felt like it was helping move the baby down.

Then our midwife was finally there and I had a big feeling of relief that we were ready to meet this baby! I was on my knees and leaning over the side of the pool and our doula asked me to try putting one leg up to help things progress. I tried this for one surge and afterward felt like I should squat, which I did. On the next surge I could feel the burning sensation on my perineum and knew he was close! I was squeezing my husband’s arms so hard as he was kneeling in front of me providing support. On the next push I could feel our baby’s head coming out! And my bag of water finally popped and a huge feeling of pressure was released. I kept pushing and pushing and in one long push he slipped completely out! I had a huge feeling of relief and joy and our midwife said excitedly “get your baby!” I looked down and saw him floating up in the water toward me. I reached down and picked him up and he was slipping out of my hands, our midwife quickly helped and slipped the cord from over his head (which I didn’t know was there until I saw the video!) and placed him in my arms, he was crying loudly which I was relieved to hear!

Our nanny and daughter had just returned from the bagel shop and our daughter was so excited to meet her brother! I spent about 20 min in the pool holding him and still felt crampy and asked our midwife when the placenta would come out. She offered to give the cord a little tug and it slipped right out, another big feeling of relief! I got into bed and cuddled up with our baby, daughter and hubby and baby Isaac latched right on. Our midwife examined me and I had no tearing, not even a scratch! It felt amazing to be able to sit up and move around without pain. My midwife also informed me that because my waters broke at the last minute, Isaac was protected from GBS and I hadn’t needed any antibiotics! Our daughter and my husband cut the cord about an hour and a half after the birth and Isaac was finally weighed and measured. He had latched so well and gotten enough milk (our daughter still nurses a little so my body still produced milk even through the pregnancy) that he was calm and happy through that process. Our birth team cleaned everything up and within 3 hours we were relaxing together as a new family of 4!

Overall I couldn’t have asked for a better at home birth experience. I am so grateful for the Positive Birth Company for helping me prepare and for all the stories from the amazing and courageous mothers that I read on here. I will definitely be recommending this course to other mothers to be!