Birth story - Alicia and baby Eden

I had my daughter Isla in 2017, she was 2 days early. I had polyhydromnios so was categorised as high risk. My waters broke and a few hours after admission midwives identified meconium. So I ended up being continually monitored and on my back. I pleaded to be in water or mobile but had been advised that it just wouldn’t be possible. Despite this I progressed really well with just the use of a TENS machine to 5cm. I ended up having a syntocinon drip when I ‘failed to progress’ and stayed at 5cm for 2 hours. With hindsight, after working through the digital pack as well as requesting old hospital notes I realised that this was due to adrenaline. It coincided with a handover to another midwife who made me feel very uncomfortable due to a number of factors. I ended up having an epidural, episiotomy and forceps delivery. The whole experience was scary and I felt I had zero control over any part of the labour.

I have struggled up until now, after the birth of my second daughter to come to terms with the events of my first labour. I had no faith in myself as a mother and have felt broken physically and mentally. When I fell pregnant for the 2nd time (not planned) I felt anxious for most of the pregnancy but determined to try and ensure that my labour would not follow the same path of that of my 1st labour. At my first midwife appointment I was asked which hospital I wanted to deliver at, I requested a home birth and the midwife seemed very surprised but was supportive and referred me on to the home birth team. I brought the digital pack and started listening to the majority of it after week 36 once I had finished work, better late than never! Everything made perfect sense to me and my husband.

The home birth midwives who had been visiting me throughout my pregnancy we’re all fantastic. I was advised early on to have this baby in hospital due to mild haemorrhaging in my first labour, I used my BRAIN and after weighing up all of the evidence I decided to go ahead with a home birth. I had a care plan in place signed by a consultant which I had to sign to agree to certain measures that were recommended if I was to have baby at home. I had trust and faith in every single one of the midwives and they were all fully supportive of the decisions I made.

One day past my due date the midwife advised I go for a good walk, I sobbed on my walk due to the pain from sciatica and SPD. However that evening I lost a lot of what appeared to be my mucus plug & then I had sickness and diarrhoea. I was experiencing some cramps but thought they were due to the ‘bug’ that I probably had.

After a fairly good night sleep I was sat with my daughter and husband, who had not gone to work due to the ‘bug’ that I thought I had. At 915am on Friday 20th March I felt a huge thud and my waters broke, my husband dropped our daughter at nursery (it was the last day of opening before lockdown!) and the midwives came at 1015am to drop the birthing pool off. At this point I was having what I would describe as mild period pain around every 10 minutes and was happily cleaning away in my kitchen. Midwives said I was probably very early on and we agreed that they should go and continue with other visits. About 20 minutes after midwives left I felt that I should start getting myself into the zone, as I call it, as I felt the period type pains were getting a bit more intense and more frequent, however I was not timing them at this point.

I sat on a birthing ball in the UFO position leaning over a nice big pile of cushions stacked on my sofa. My head and shoulders relaxed upon the pillows and rocking on my ball I listened to the tracks on the Freya app and felt utterly relaxed. I put my TENS machine on which I found very useful in both labours, I was back and forth throughout my labour to the toilet still having diarrhoea which the midwives say was just my body ‘clearing out’ and not a bug! Friends had dropped some incense sticks through the door and my husband had put one of these on, I remember the smell just being divine when I walked into the room. It definitely took me to another level of relaxation, we definitely underestimate how important our senses are. My husband had been setting up the pool which takes 2-3 hours to inflate and fill. I started timing my contractions at 1142am as I felt they were fairly frequent. I was very, very surprised when the Freya app told me my surges were only 2-3 minutes apart and that I was in established labour. I informed my husband who was very surprised like myself and we both made a comment about the midwives saying I was ‘early on’, we also both felt that I probably still had a way to go. My husband asked if he should call them back at this point but I said no.

Around 1215pm I got to the toilet in between surges but when I got there I leant over the sink and started making the animalistic noises that people talk about. I remember the sensation all of a sudden being different and the pressure in my back passage being more intense of that than just needing a poo. At 1228 my husband called the midwives back, at my request, I remember internally having a bit of a wobble and verbalising that I was probably only a few cm and not coping. I got back to the sofa where my husband started stroking my back like a tree working upwards, this was wonderful, I felt reassured and supported. I remember standing up feeling like I could no longer sit and then dropping to my knees as I felt my coccyx move and my babies head all of a sudden descend. It was so surreal but I felt so excited and relieved knowing that I was going to meet my baby and that I had got to this point by myself. I said to my husband that I could feel her head coming down and he started panicking, asking me to get in the pool which he said was nearly full. I explained that I couldn’t move and that she was coming, I remember his sense of panic and me having to reassure him! Telling him to hold my hand and repeating it’s going to be ok in between the down breathing. At 1245pm the midwives arrived and as they walked through the door I lifted my head and told them that I thought her head was here, they were so surprised. They pulled my pants down and Eden was born at 1246pm, weighing 8lb 15oz.

I went into the pool to try and deliver my placenta it was so helpful for the third stage and the back pains. I had a small 2nd degree tear that was stitched at home, the midwives laughed about how I was smiling throughout being stitched but I was so in ore of the fact I could have such wonderful care at home & that I had delivered my baby at home so calmly. I was euphoric and it restored my faith in myself as a mother and a strong powerful woman. My husband was in complete disbelief at how different my labours had been & he feels like home birth should be shouted from the rooftops as do I. Midwives had left us by 1600 and it was lovely for my daughter to come home from nursery and meet her baby sister. Eden had her 24hr check at home & we have not had to go anywhere so lockdown has been quite an idyllic bubble for us so far. In terms of recovery physically & mentally what took me 9-10 months after my previous labour only took a few days this time round. I can’t believe that I can feel my pelvic floor working so well! Breastfeeding has also been so much easier.

I am so, so thankful to the positive birth company for the digital pack & Freya app and of course the wonderful University hospitals of Leicester home birth team (UHLHomebirthteam on Instagram) for helping me to believe in myself & to support me to have the most incredible birth.